Some People Change
by KenSan1990
Summary: Labels at school are obvious. Kenshin was your average bad boy. Kaoru was the wallflower. After a grizzely breakup, Kenshin has changed...alot, now he must learn what the other side of the ropes is. AU KK, SM, AM
1. Prologue

A/N: This story is kind of based off an experience. It's at school and this kid thinks he all that, and he always annoying me, and on this trip we fought bad! So i got a KenshinKao thing going, but it's gonna be real different.

**Groups**

The school was as it should as Kenshin arrived that morning. Quiet, content...time to reek some havoc.

Students gathered outside on the courtyard waiting for the faculty to open the doors. They crowed into their label groups of friends. Preps talking about their latest break-up, or the newest fashion. Those talks. Then there were smarts sitting together, more popular students trying to steal their homework to get the right answers on the math homework. There was the Goths staring at everyone like they looked straight into your soul. The same. There was one group that everyone fears. It was more of a gang if you think about it. Lead by Himura Kenshin himself. It was a punk group that the teachers were practically afraid of. They waited at the two picnic tables. No one told them to get off either.

"Ey, Kenshin!" one spiky-haired man yelled. Kenshin and him clasped hands and stared at one another for a moment. Sagara Sanosuke was a right-hand man you could say. He was right behind Kenshin. "What was the hold up?" he asked.

"Not much,"

"Hiko again?"

"Dad's outta control with me. Thinks I'm gonna _start_ robbing things," Kenshin gave a laugh. Start was not the right word to use at this moment. Continue might be a tad better.

"He rides on you don't he?"

"Only for the best right?"Kenshin asked sarcastically as he pulled out a book. "Tomoe 'round?" he asked.

"The girl's talkin over there," Sanosuke jerked a thumb over to the cheerleader's gossiping. "The woman's a chatterbox Kenshin. Why do you like her?"

"Because if she the one talking, I don't have to," he answered. The book was his personal sketchbook. The scenes weren't exactly show and tell material.

Cocking his head over to the rest of the group he examined the line-up. There was Seta Sojiro. He was quiet and very happy looking, never taking the smile from his face, but he was trouble. Then Shinomori Aoshi. He was real quiet. A nick name was ice man because he was so emotionless. Makoto Shishio was a power-hungry member, and not willing to except that Kenshin was better than he was. He wasn't too pleasing to the eye after a bad accident. He got stuck inside a building because he refused to come out for the police. He was burned seriously and was always bandaged. Sagara Sanosuke was a rough-houser. He thought he was this ladies'-man. Never.

Each of these members had something about them, skills in fighting really that made them who they were. They were fierce.

"Any plans for the weekend?" Kenshin asked

"Party tomorrow night. Preppy 'Gumi," Kenshin arched a brow. "Kitsune," Sanosuke said and Kenshin nodded.

"You have too many names for her,"

"I'm gonna get her," Sanosuke was determined.

"Why do you care?" Sojiro asked. "You have asked her twenty-seven times, and she's answered 'no' twenty-five," Kenshin turned to him.

"What about the other two?" Kenshin's curiosity got the better of him.

"She spit in his face and called him a royal idiot," Sojiro stated laughing. Kenshin joined in.

"You deserve no less Sagara," Aoshi stated.

"Shut up would ya?!" he yelped. Kenshin hopped on the table continuing the new sketch. "Coming to the party?" Sanosuke asked.

"Why not? Tomoe'll be there, so no doubt I'll be dragged," he stated.

"Just the small price to pay as being a cheerleader's boy huh?" Sanosuke asked punching Kenshin's arm. "Caught a good one. Not too over the top. Still...the talking," Sanosuke said.

"Hush," Kenshin hissed as Tomoe strut over hand on her hip.

"Hiya baby," she said running her hand down his face. Kenshin smiled nicely and slid down.

"Morning," he wrapped his arms around her waist giving her a kiss.

"You're coming to Megumi's party right?" she asked fixing the collar of his black leather jacket. He turned with a smile and stared at Sanosuke with a ' I told you so,' look on his face.

"Of course. I would not think of anything better to do. Especially with you there," Tomoe had pushed away and Kenshin re-straightened the collar of the jacket. If there was anything he hated, it was people fixing the way he looked. He was your classic looking bad boy. Leather jacket and messy shirt. Blue jeans with boots. Gloves from where he drives his motorcycle. His hair was always pulled into a pony-tail; sometime greased back with a few strands loose. Today he let his bangs cover his eyes. Those eyes that swirled between colors of a honey, or an amethyst.

"Aw, you're too good to me," she giggled. "So what do you think of these new uniforms for the cheerleaders?" she asked turning. Kenshin cringed at the question. He looked at her and at her expression.

"Not that bad, but..."

"Oh good. I thought it made me look too big," she said. Meaning her butt. Kenshin shook his head. She did get aggravating, but was she a looker. Her pale skin in contrast to that silky black hair. Her lips were nice too.

"Glad I could help," the guys behind him were laughing. Kenshin glared at them.

"I'm_ late! I'm late!_" Kenshin heard the yelling from a while away. Turning his head to the street he saw a black-haired girl running in a pair of flip-flops down the street. She was panicked, and then when he realized it, it was the wallflower. Kamiya Kaoru was a shy girl who was smart. She found his kind stupid and always says something about it. Kenshin was always repulsed by her. She was out of style and she was the…help the community...type.

"Run like the wind Jou-chan!" Sanosuke howled mockingly.

"Oh shut up rooster head!" Kaoru yelled as she ran up the steps and into the building. She was a teacher's aide and allowed into the building by putting a key to the scanner.

"Geekazoid that woman. Won't ever get a date," Tomoe said and leaned on Kenshin seductively. The bell rang and students flooded into the school, the gang slow behind." So, baby, I will see you at seven?" she asked.

"I'll be by," he answered and split away from the group.

A/N: Boring. Trust me, it will get better. Especially next chapter. Kenshin is one bad boy...hehehehehe. Till next time. KenSan out!


	2. Smart Mouth vs Smart Mouth

A/N: Wow! Turnout/ Yes! Slow! I know. It was an introductory sort iof thing I guess you could say. More than anything else. I will try to make this chapter more interesting. Okay! Enjoy!

**Smart-Mouth vs. Smart-Mouth**

The school day was...typical. Kenshin of course was anything but tolerable in class. That earned him a nice lunch detention the next day, not to mention an after school. All he did was laugh at the teacher who struggled to keep a straight face. Subs were such wimps.

The whole time, Kaoru watched from the back. This man was a smart-mouth, and several other names she dare not utter in public. Her eyes always watched Kenshin. His body was as stiff as a board and she never understood why. If he was such a ' free soul' shall we call it, then why was he stiff? Sighing, Kaoru stood at the bell prepared to head to the gym for kendo. Kenshin eyed her as she walked out, the sub talking non-stop about his...as she said..._ an absolute atrocity for a man of adolescence_,' not that that really meant anything to Kenshin. He had teachers…Subs...so riled they were about to yell the whole alphabet of swear words to him.

"That teacher made no sense," Sanosuke stated.

"You're tellin' me. And did you see her mustache?" Kenshin snickered. Sanosuke laughed at him hard.

"Cruel man. Cruel," Sanosuke slung his arm over Kenshin's shoulders as they walked out of the building.

"I think I will bestow the hairy-lipped maiden my best gift," said Kenshin as he pulled out the keys to his motor-bike. "I hope she doesn't return it," he walked over to the parking lot. It was easy to pick out the car. He saw her arrive that morning. It was an old ding-upped car with chipping paint and a disgusting interior. "You know, I believe that this will be a nice addition to this old jalopy," Kenshin pulled up one key, the key to his bike and started at the front-end of the car. He walked with one hand in his pocket, the other smoothly scratching and scraping against the metal giving a dull shriek. Sanosuke nearby covered his ears watching his friend, the other three members walking out from kendo.

Kenshin walked back over his key still up and he looked at the paint that was in the grooves. "I wonder how many times she's painted the crappy old thing," he snickered showing Sanosuke. There was a blue under the maroon. "Not surprised. It really didn't help the car," Kenshin pocketed his keys and sat on the picnic table watching the door. It pushed open one last time, the young Kaoru storming out and toward the table.

"Oi, Jou-chan! Where's the fire?"

"Shut up!" she yelled and went straight up into the gang leader's face. "Just who do you think you are?" she gave a low, hollow hiss in her question. Kenshin's eyes examined her sapphire that was full of rage. Her hair was out of place and face full of sweat from the kendo practice. "Well?" she asked again. She was only an inch shorter than he at best.

"Himura Kenshin, that's who I am. And I can tell you who you are if you have forgotten," he grinned like the Cheasher cat as her face scrunched up.

"You are a foul man, you know that? With a mouth like that, I don't see why you haven't been killed yet,"

"Well, every man who's tried has tended to go missing," he was picking his teeth with his pinky, not concerned at all about Kaoru. "Now, why do you come to me with an attitude you obviously stole from somebody?" Kaoru blushed. He'd never seen her mad. To tell the truth, she wasn't mad yet.

"I will tell the teacher who did this to her car," Kaoru threatened. _'Oh great Kamiya. Act like your three,'_

"Oh really? And I suppose your also going to tell one me for finger-painting the wall?" he mocked. Kaoru finally threw out what she had been thinking.

"Himura Kenshin, I swear, one day, just one day, that mouth will get you hurt. And when that day comes, nobody will help you. You want to know why? Because they'll all be afraid to come near that acid blood of yours!" she yelled and felt proud of herself until she looked in his eyes and saw they were still dulled.

"Sure my blood's not poison?" he asked. Sanosuke grinned widely along with the others. Kaoru pulled him down by the ear. "Don't you dare touch me you filthy geek," Kenshin roared and pushed her down. Kaoru picked up her book him stepping on one of them, pushing it into the mud.

"Get off that, you pig!" she roared back. This was a battle of the smart-mouths.

"I give you three weeks of allowance on Kenshin," Sanosuke said to Sojiro. Sojiro snickered extending his hand to the spiky-haired man.

"I'll take that," they shook hands watching the two.

Kaoru stood fully in Kenshin's face, her eyes staring at his strange amber eyes. "I dare you to make me," he whispered. Kaoru clenched her teeth and put her hands up shoving against his chest. He grabbed her wrists. "You have frail wrists," he hissed. "If you really want them broken, I suggest that you get off my jacket," Kaoru furrowed her brows and tightened her grip on the leather jacket.

"And if you don't want your precious jacket ripped, I suggest that you let me go,"

"Ooooooooooo" Sojiro and Sanosuke were having fun watching this.

"Himura's a fool," Shishio turned away.

"Yeah right. She doesn't know about the switch in his back pocket." Sanosuke explained.

"And if you pull that thing out on me, I swear I will get you in juvie."

"Been there, done that sweet-heart," whispered in her ear. Neither him, nor Kaoru let up one moment as they stared at each other.

"This is amusing really," Aoshi said sliding over. "They do look cute together," Kenshin turned his head to Aoshi glaring harder than every.

"Shut yer yap!" he barked. In that moment of lost concentration Kaoru shoved Kenshin down into the mud; she swiped up her boot-printed history book.

"You owe me three weeks allowance Sano," Sojiro said.

"Drat!"

"Himura Kenshin. You really don't think I can do anything to you. But I can tell them what you do after school, and I don't mean detention," she hissed. His eyes went wide, and Kaoru smiled. She knew everything about him, that was, after school.

"Try me," Kaoru turned away and started to stomp as her father pulled up.

"She can swing those hips," Sanosuke watched her as she got in the car. Kenshin shook his head and lay down on the picnic table. "She's got some nice legs Kenshin. Why turn her down?"

"Because the girl has ' geek' written on her forehead," he said opening one eye to look at his friend.

"Aw, man, she's pretty,"

"She's flat-chested. She's a geek, and she's a tomboy. I do not want any of that. Tomoe's fine for me," he was getting angry.

"Sano lay off," Sojiro whispered. He had hit Sanosuke in the ribs. Rubbing them, Sanosuke stared at his friend and thought. All of them had the typical problems. Drugs, arrests, fighting. Their parents not being around too much. But Kenshin...Kenshin was a whole different story. A whole different league than any of them. His life was hell the day he was born. His parents neglected him, and when they didn't they beat him severely. He'd be bleeding or broke something, and they wouldn't do anything for him. Just watch him suffer. That was, until he learned to fight back. When that occurred, they cast him on the streets, and he didn't even try to come back.

On the street, drugs came into his possession, and by thirteen he had been arrests for substance use and, selling. He was taken to foster homes were he kept moving through what had to be at least seven, he stopped at Hiko. Hiko pulled him into his reality, where Kenshin just grew up. He still fought against Hiko's rules, which got him in trouble constantly. Since he was under strict rules, Kenshin could not do much that was illegal. he did still get away with small robbery's and drank every now in then. And this was where he was now.

"Kenshin." Sanosuke nudged him. "Yo, Kenshin," he was nudged again. "Sleepy?" he asked.

"I guess," he answered and slid off of the table heading to the parking lot to his motor cycle.

"Kenshin?" Sanosuke caught up to hs friend and stopped him with a hand on the shoulder. "You alright?" he asked.

"Hai..." he answered." I need to relax," he stated and shoved hid friend away as he got on the bike. Sanosuke just watched as the seventeen year old red-head sped off.

"I'm sure you're fine," he murmured and started off to his car the other way.

--

When Kenshin reached home, he saw the television on in the living room. It was six o' clock. Hiko was probably waiting for Kenshin. Kenshin was prepared to get his head chewed off.

Parking the bike in front, he got off and started to the house looking in the window. Hiko was sitting in the chair. There was that horrible look on his face. Rolling his eyes Kenshin started to the door and when he looked back, Hiko had gotten up. The door was opened for him, Hiko glaring daggers at his adoptive son. "Where the heck have you been?"

"Out,"

"Out? And how so to get that dirty," there was dried mud on his face and his pants.

"Does that matter?" Kenshin asked walking in. He kicked off his boots as to not anger Hiko further about his lack of cleanliness.

"I asked you a question. Don't think you can talk like a smart-mouth to me," Kenshin stared at the man's flaming eyes. Hiko was a tall man; between six two and six four. Kenshin didn't bother. He had his long hair in a pony-tail, and sharp eyes. He held Kenshin's chin, forcing him to look toward Hiko.

"Leave me alone," Kenshin tried to push him away. Hiko grabbed his son by the arm.

"It's your turn to cook," Kenshin pulled away from his father's grip and trudged to the kitchen. Kenshin didn't live as an only child. Hiko had recently taken on Ayame and Suzume. Little sisters. Sure, Kenshin didn't enjoy his father, but he was a teenager. Were you supposed to enjoy your parent?

"Ken-nii," Kenshin glanced over as he began to prepare dinner. They watched him. They were the only one's he was nice too. These girls, like he, had been abused and he took the liberty of making them feel comfortable. Hiko watched his son from the doorway. "You're pissy. What's up?"

"Nothing," Kenshin stated. "Don't expect me to hang around. I'm leaving soon," Kenshin informed.

"Planning to rob a place?"

"Iie. Tomoe's dragging me to a party," he answered. Ayame ran out, Suzume behind each trying to get to their ' older brother,' first.

"Ken-nii!" Ayame whined holding up a large picture that was finger-panted. "For you." She said. Suzume shoved her older sibling out of the way.

"Ken-nii. Here," little Suzume also had a painting. Kenshin, breaking a decent smile, took both of them. They simultaneously asked:

"Who's better?" Kenshin hated this.

"I like them both." his voice was still really gruff. He tried to sound nice, but it wasn't quite working.

"You alright?" Hiko asked noticing Kenshin recoil a bit.

"I'm fine," he responded cruelly. "I just need to be alone for a little bit," he answered. Walking out of the kitchen, Kenshin made it home in his bedroom laying on his futon.

Outside, Hiko looked at what Kenshin had started. It was a fine meal. It was strange how well the boy was with his hands. He listened to Kenshin as he picked up a gutar in his room and started to play.

"Otou-san?" Suzume asked. "Ken-nii okay?" Hiko closed his eyes.

"Yeah. He's..." Hiko paused. Kenshin was having a reflection of his past. All Hiko had done was make it worse."…fine." Hiko finished. Kenshin would get himself away from the memories. One way...or another. His way was hurting his body too.

Sighing, Hiko knocked on the door when Tomoe had arrived.

"Kenshin!" he yelled out," girlfriend's here!" Kenshin shot up and walked out of the room nonchalantly like there was nothing wrong. "Can I expect you back?" Hiko asked. Kenshin never said a word as he hook arms with Tomoe and slammed the door shut.

"I have a bad feeling about this,"

A/N: bad life. Bad, bad life. Okay, now what do you think will happen since Hiko had a ' bad feeling'? Tell me what you think. Till next time, KenSan out!


	3. The Truth of Words

A/N: Yeah, boring, glad someone got the right answer of Hiko's bad vibe. Okay, I hope you enjoy!

**The Truth of Words**

Kenshin was behind Tomoe on his bike. After all, Tomoe was the one to know the way to Megumi's home. Kenshin did know, but directions were vague. There was one thing though that stood out: Megumi lived on the east side of town. The nice side of town in what everyone knew was a mansion, even though she wouldn't gloat about it. Megumi's parents and her brothers were all doctors, and Megumi herself was no exception. She was a nice girl, snooty, or foxy at times, but she was nice for the average cheerleader.

Tomoe herself was on the cusp between the east and west side, she was in a middle-high class family with one younger brother and her father. Her mother died when she was very young. If there was anything Kenshin was good at, it was finding out everything there was to know about a person before he got in a relation or friendship. Tomoe herself was nice when she wanted to be, and she probably deserved better than what Kenshin could give her, but if she liked him then that worked just as well.

Inside Kenshin knew that he wasn't good enough. After all, he was a west side civilian. A stereotypical life he lived lived what everyone saw of the west side. Maybe he was giving it a bad name. The west side was a lower-middle class place, and you'll see that it's not too pretty. Streets are full of trash and potholes that everyone complains about. You would see bums, cross-dressers, drug-dealers, the whole nine yards. It was life though. Every city has their bad side, this one was no exception.

Megumi's side of town was always clean and the houses were large. Life was as best as it could come by. This night, Friday, Megumi's parents were out of town on an emergency and wouldn't be back for the weekend. Her brothers were working late, but then again, they never cared about what Megumi did, throwing a party wise.

She pulled into the long drive-way where cars were lined up. Tomoe parked behind, or at least what looked like a blue car. She got out and Kenshin walked up to her. She pushed a few of his stray hairs behind his ear, which he snorted at but kept in place. "Be on a good behavior tonight, alright Kenny?" she asked wrapped around his arm. Kenshin grunted, which to Tomoe a legitamite 'yes' was considering that he never gave her a straight answer.

"Tomoe! Hurry up!" a boy yelled in the distance. Tomoe unclasped from her boyfriend and ran to him. It was Kiyosato Akira. He was wearing a nice flannel shirt hugging around Tomoe. " I thought you would never get here. It started at seven." he showed her his watch which read seven thirty.

"Akira, it's fashionably late. You should know that." Tomoe stated. "Kenshin, quit dragging your feet and get over here." Tomoe waved her hand insinuating him to come. Shoving his hands in his pockets Kenshin steadied a fast walk to her right side. "So did I miss anything?" Tomoe asked. She was hooked to both Akira and Kenshin's arms.

"Not really. Sanosuke came her trying to crash the place. Megumi ended up using him to play pin the tale on the rooster." Tomoe laughed.

"That sounds like Sano." Kenshin stated rolling his eyes at his rather ditzy friend. "Any of the others here?" he asked.

"Shinomori is, besides that no. Misao dragged him. I mean literally too. She dragged him back here. I didn't know the girl had that much power in those tiny arms." Tomoe hit Akira playfully on the arm. Her acting toward him was strange considering Kenshin was her boyfriend.

Through a gate to the back were flashing lights coming from a sliding back door. The back was bare and dark. A few pillars decorated around the pool with statues. The pool was not covered yet, but it was getting cooler and should be soon.

"About how many people did Megumi invite?" Tomoe asked looking inside which was crowded.

"The whole upper class population and a few extras."

"About two-hundred?" Kenshin asked.

Akira shrugged answering:" Yeah. You could say," he opened the door and the music blared. Kenshin shut it closed, as not to disturb the neighbors too badly. The last thing he needed was the police popping up.

Tomoe raced around the room gossiping with her close friends, while Kenshin lounged on the wall nothing to do. He only know Sanosuke and Aoshi closely, the others were just names and faces that he really couldn't match. He could talk to Aoshi because he wasn't allowed fifty feet away from the pint-sized Misao, and Sanosuke was still being used as a party game. You could see his boxers through the holes in his jeans.

He pulled away from the people and hid on the wall next to his red-headed friend. "Kami-sama. That fox is vicious," he was catching his breath between words.

"Calm down. She'll leave you alone when she sees you've had enough." Kenshin stated. Megumi was very playful. She would give a somewhat torture to her victims, then smooth it over later in the night. "Watch out though. I've heard the woman's a vixen." Kenshin warned. Sanosuke looked to the ceiling and did all he could from passing out. It was either a perverted or a scared thought. Sanosuke blushed when he looked at Megumi. Perverted. Defiantly.

"Why'd you come? I know you hate parties." a voice said. Kenshin looked over his shoulder to Aoshi who had reluctantly pulled from Misao.

"Eh. Something to do. Better than dad biting at me all night of how my manners are horrible." Kenshin sat down in a chair leaning his head on the back. "Besides. If I say no to Tomoe, I don't know what'll happen."

"Afraid of being dumped?" Sanosuke asked eyeing Kenshin.

"Yeah right. I'm afraid of her," Kenshin rolled his eyes. "The only thing I mean is that it will harm my rep."

"I thought you didn't care about that. You said you could build it up."

"That was before." Kenshin growled. "Tomoe's one of the top four." Kenshin stated. The top four were broke into boys and girls. The most beautiful of each group basically. Tomoe said Kenshin probably lingered on the outside ring of the guys due to his rough personality. Then again, most of the popular girls were vile little snakes, so it didn't really matter. Tomoe was number two in the school, just below Megumi because she was wealthy. Then after Tomoe was Tae and Sae, (Since the two were twins, they looked the same) and Misao was four. None of them tried to push up, because if they did, they went down. You went up by occupation, style and uniqueness. Kenshin didn't really care about the guys; after all, he was a guy, why would he want to look at one?

"Guess you got a point there." Sanosuke pushed through all the people and came back with a bottle in his hand. "Sake'?" he asked. Kenshin took it and started to sip it down. "Don't get yourself comatose, 'kay?" Sanosuke asked. Kenshin nodded. "Don't want to lug you home like last time. I was suffering Hiko's nagging." Kenshin laughed.

"It won't get that bad. I can't drink that bad anyway. Tomoe wants me on ' good behavior'" but Kenshin laughed at that.

"You're her pet now, aren't you?" Sanosuke asked.

"Nah. I can put her in place if I need to-" he took a big drink of the bottle. "- I just typically don't need too." Sanosuke was silent. Kenshin was going to go against his word that night, Sanosuke just knew it. If there was anything you couldn't stop Kenshin from, it was drinking.

Was he ever right too? It had to have been two hours later, and the party only got bigger. Sanosuke could barely find his short friend over all the people. He was sitting away from everybody, with Tomoe in front of him yelling. "I ask you one small thing!" Sanosuke heard her say. "Can you ever do anything right?"

"Aw shut up! I can do what I want and you have no say in it!" heads turned for a moment and Kenshin closed his eyes. "If you want to do something about this, let's take it outside." Tomoe slammed the door open and pulled him out, agreeing to his proposition. Sanosuke couldn't get to the door as Tomoe slammed it shut.

"Tomoe. I'm not drunk. Do you hear me slurring?" he asked. Tomoe put her hand on her hip, the plaid skirt ruffling.

"Kenshin, that doesn't matter. I can prove you are drunk."

"Do you want me to prove it? Here let me walk straight." he looked at his feet finding a line in the brick patio and following it. Tomoe watched. Kenshin barely faltered as he moved, but for her that didn't mean anything. Kenshin had a trained body, and in this state could keep himself straight, especially against the police which he trained it for.

"I'll show you." she came up to him and stomped her boot down on his. He twitched in pain and then glared at her. He had tried to move, she could see, but it wasn't fast enough. "You have the reflexes of a God to move as fast as you need. I would never to be able to do that unless you're intoxicated! You're gonna crash if you drive like this." she stated and started to walk forward. Kenshin moved backward to her movements until he felt a mist.

"Tomoe. I've never crashed and never will. You need to get off my back and chill."

"Maybe you should chill Kenshin!" and she shoved at his chest causing him to lose balance.

Kenshin could do nothing as he was sent plummeting into Megumi's pool. The water was freezing and it pricked at his body. Tomoe stared down at him, backing up so he couldn't grab her and pull her in. His red hair clouded around his face, and she could hardly make it out. Bubbles reached the top and she saw him struggle to come up, but he made it. Tomoe continued to back up as he put his hands on the side. His hair was plastered to his face and he spit out water, glaring amber to Tomoe who continued to scowl. "Better Kenshin? Maybe you're not so hot-headed." Kenshin continued to climb up, gritting his teeth.

"How dare you defile me wench?!" he yelled and she saw a glint. He had pulled out the switch-blade.

"You're irrational!" she ducked as he lunged at her. Kenshin rebounded, putting his hand on the ground and spinning to squat on the other side of her. Water puddled at his feet as he stood fully.

"You're the one who threw me into the pool!" he ran toward her and slammed her to the ground. Tomoe squirmed under his crushing grip. They had been this close before, but it was a happier moment, a more...romantic moment. Fear only struck Tomoe's eyes looking in his. She could see he was clouded too. "Die now you wench!" he flung the blade down, but failed to hit her when she grabbed his hand. He was weakened, giving her the upper-hand.

"Kenshin, this is the final straw. I've put up with a brute like you for far too long," she hissed and pushed the knife closer to Kenshin's face making a horizontal mark. He screeched in pain as the blood dripped to the ground. Tomoe was able to retrieve the blade from him as he covered the wound. Blood seeped through his hands. Finally he let them down looking up to Tomoe who chucked the knife to the water. "Stop this and I won't call the police," she said quietly.

"When I stop, you'll be dead." his voice was hollow and when she looked at him all she really saw was the blood dripping and the deep amber eyes glaring at her. She started to run around the pillars. At the top were statues, but most of them were large. She needed a small one just to knock him out, but not to kill him. Kenshin was following her, popping up on the other side of the pillars as Tomoe would cast her gaze upward. It took her five minutes to find the right statue. It was a small statue of cupid and she pushed it as Kenshin got near. The statue toppled and Kenshin got under it at the right moment. It crashed as it hit him and fell to pieces on cutting across his face finishing the cross on his face. Tomoe moved forward and Kenshin instantly crumpled at her feet. Blood seeped from his forehead; his eyes closed and face peaceful. Tomoe kneeled to him flipping his over seeing him crack his eyes open for a second to glace at her.

"Kenshin..." the voice rang in his ears and hurt his head, "we're through..." and she stood walking away. It was hard to, seeing him bleeding and unconscious, but it was what he deserved out of anything.

Kenshin just lay there, thinking. His mind was clouded with a thought as he tried to cling to the little consciousness he had. The thought that he last remembered before he the world went black..._ One day Kenshin, you'll get hurt...and no-one will come and help you...You want to know why? ...They'll be afraid to touch your acid blood..._the world spun as Kenshin tumbled to the darkness, hoping, just hoping, someone would help him.

A/N: I said grizzly. He's got the scar now. How bad will he change...Or will it be for the good? You'll have to find out. Till next time. KenSan out!


	4. Premonitions

A/N: Hello! Glad that people like! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! I happy hehehehehe Okay, now that I'm done being hyper, lets get on with this. I think you'll like it. It's angsty-suspensish.

**Premonitions**

Hiko didn't understand the call. It was just a blur, and he even had to ask the man to tell him again. When he repeated it, Hiko did everything he could to keep his ground. After all, Ayame and Suzume were lingering behind him.

It was ten at night; Hiko knew that Kenshin would be out at least until tomorrow, if not at the party then with Tomoe. Now, it was hard to believe what happened. A man calling him from the hospital telling him hat Kenshin had been injured. At first thought, Hiko believed Kenshin might have became drunk and tried to drive home. He was told though that Kenshin had been outside of Megumi's home...assaulted.

With no explanation, and the entire family in their pajamas, Hiko shoved the two little girls into the car, each a quizzical glance to there father and one another. Hiko put the key in the ignition, his foot tapping while he barely focused on the road and the constant patter of questions from his daughters. "Otou-san!" Ayame whined out and finally Hiko looked to her and back explaining.

"Your onii-san has been hurt," Hiko stated, not wanting to hear them whine about not knowing, but knew that they would whine about knowing as well. The whole thing was getting vicious. He knew Kenshin would get hurt one day, but on the horrid motorcycle that he rode, not by someone's hand. He had been told that they didn't know who did it, just that he needed to be there for support.

The girls held one another and cried, Hiko biting back every last tear, only one falling. Sure, Kenshin was a pain in the butt, but what teenager wasn't? And it was Hiko's duty as a parent to worry, right?

Sighing, Hiko closed his eyes as they stopped for a moment. The girls quieted when they saw Hiko's face. Sure they were in pain, but Hiko was in agony for this. As children they saw emotion better than anyone.

They made it to the hospital, Hiko leaning on the back of the seat for a moment as he parked. "Tou-chan?" Ayame tugged Hiko's shirt. Trying to smile, Hiko opened the door and let the girls crawl over his lap and get down before him. He needed to be steady; if he walked in there drunken people will worry.

He picked up Suzume, holding young Ayame by the hand who struggled to keep up with her father. They entered, a woman looking up others passing. The room was very light, and white. "Yes sir?" the lady asked cheerfully even though she saw the discontent written on Hiko's face. "What can I help you with?"

"Himura? Himura Kenshin? I was told he was brought here," the woman gave him a finger and began to search through the computer. Hiko tapped his fingers on the desk, Suzume hugging his neck in worry.

"Ah, he's resting, room 314, second floor," Hiko nodded murmuring a thank you to the woman as he rushed off. She continued to smile, her face somewhat in misery.

Hiko ran as fast as he could, remembering that he was dragging Ayame behind him. She had a lot of speed though. Being that she was as concerned as Hiko was, the speed was probably the same.

Hiko opened the door, the room silent except for a few beeps. At the far bed of the small room, Kenshin's figure lain. He was pale and covered to his chin in a blanket. A large bandage covered the left side of his face, the blood soaking through to form the cross shape. Hiko set Suzume down, the sisters latching hands as they waddled over. Hiko stood near the bed momentarily, Kenshin was peaceful it seemed. His hair spilled across the pillow, soaking it; it still damp. Hiko finally sat, crossing his arms stiffly, sighing again. Ayame and Suzume crawled in a chair together; they were right next to the bed touching their brother's hand. "I never thought that you would be stupid enough to get hurt," Hiko laughed. "Baka."

Ayame and Suzume gazed momentarily to their father. "Tou-chan?" Suzume asked. "Why are you calling Ken-nii idiot?" she asked sweetly as she climbed from the maroon chair. Hiko could barely look into those eyes without feeling regret.

"I'm flustered that all," Hiko reassured her. "Kenshin will be fine, okay?" Suzume climbed up into Hiko's lap, grappling his t-shirt and curling up. He started to rub her small back and watched her eyes droop. Ayame curled in the seat becoming sleepy as he started a low hum. It was something he did to Kenshin when he was having a tantrum. Yes Kenshin was thirteen, but tantrums came with withdrawal.

The humming and beeping mixed together for Hiko, his eyes drooping as well, but he didn't fall asleep. He was going to wait for the moment when Kenshin woke before he did any sleeping.

Hiko set Suzume next to her older sister; they automatically hooked to one another and hugged. Hiko smiled and closed his eyes for a moment then snapped them open at a sound.

He jolted his head toward the bed that was now empty, machines being turned off. Hiko scratched his head. Where could the kid have gone? Turning, Hiko saw a pale Kenshin leaning on the counter waiting for Hiko to realize his presence. "You finally noticed. Sleepy are we?" the tone was sly as Hiko tried to stand, his body glued to the chair.

"How did you?"

"It's easy to slip under you nose," Kenshin laughed. "You're getting old."

"Why are you out of bed?! You should be resting," Kenshin was examining his nails, his hand creeping to the drawer that to the left of him. A medicine drawer if Hiko wasn't mistaken.

"Why should you care? You knew that my relationship with Tomoe was on the rocks, didn't you? You could have stopped me."

Stunned, Hiko stared at the red head trying to understand what Kenshin was saying. Tomoe and him...on the rocks? He never saw that coming. It didn't even seem as though there was something wrong with the two, they were happy as a lark.

"What are you-?"

"And if you knew that the relationship was on the rocks, wouldn't you have stopped me from going? You had a weird chill, ne?" this was all too fast for Hiko. How did Kenshin know he had a hidden chill? Why would Kenshin know that the relationship was wrong? And if he did, why would he keep it if something bad was going to happen? None of this made sense and it hurt his head.

The drawer slammed, and Hiko saw that Kenshin had a needle in his hand filled with something. "What are you-?"

"You are no father," Kenshin laughed a bit. "Any father would have stopped this..._otou-san._" Kenshin kept laughing and walked to the other side of the room, away far enough from Hiko, who was feeling glued to his chair. "Show me how much you care."

"Stop!" everything was like it was in slow motion, Kenshin sticking the needle to his wrist, right in the vein, and as he pushed out the liquid his knees buckled and the needle fell to the ground, Hiko powerless to stop the suicide. Finally he was capable of standing, the room feeling warped as Kenshin fell to the ground.

"Seijuuro-san," Hiko fell backward in the chair hitting his head hard on the ground, the chair clattering. He frantically flung up and stared at the bed from the floor level. Kenshin was still there. Swiping his hand over his forehead, Hiko noted he was heavily covered in sweat, and he panted deeply when he breathed. "Are you alright Seijuuro-san?"

"Huh?"

"Here," the doctor pulled Hiko up who looked behind him to see the floor was clear of a dead body.

"A dream," Hiko murmured.

"Hm?"

"Nothing."

The doctor flipped through a chart that was on the end of Kenshin's bed. His face was still very peaceful. It seemed too real; the smells, the sounds, everything. Hiko put the chair back up and looked to Ayame and Suzume who were still fast asleep. At least they were alright. "I am sorry for scaring you Seijuuro-san."

"It's fine. Kinda glad you woke me," Hiko admitted, his eyes constantly turning back to his son. "Will he be okay?" Hiko had to ask.

"He should be fine. The bump over the head wasn't that serious, he does have a minor concussion though. It made him pass out, but he should be fine when he wakes."

"And the cut on his face?" asked the ever curious Hiko.

"It will scar, but he'll be fine. He'll be out for a few more hours I'm guessing," the doctor stated and walked out of the room. Hiko sat...no...Dropped into his seat, worry pulling over again. The dream was horror if there wasn't any. He sighed and decided he could only do one thing -- wait.

Kenshin struggled just to open his eyes as pain washed over. His body was in ache as well, stomach twisting and churning. He remembered going to the party, he remember getting drunk even though he didn't want to admit it to Tomoe. He remembered trying to hurt her, which made him in regret.

Pulling his hands up onto his chest, Kenshin found the energy to open his eyes and looked around. To his right were his new little sisters, still curled with one another sleeping. Sunlight cracked into the rooms through pulled blinds. Looking to his left, Hiko sat reading a thick book that he had seen him read before. Hiko looked up, noticing his son had finally wakened from the unconscious state, and his worried parent kicked in.

"You scared the hell out of me!" his voice grave. "How did this happen?" Hiko asked. "Better yet, why am I so lenient on where you go?" Hiko mumbled to himself, though ever audible to Kenshin.

"G-gomennasai."

Hiko grew wide-eyed. "W-what did you say?"

"Gomennasai," Kenshin said struggling to prop on his elbows. "Is that bad to say? I did something wrong, didn't I?' Hiko was taken aback. Kenshin never apologized. Not to _**anyone.**_

"I don't believe this," Hiko put his hand on Kenshin's forehead. He wasn't warm. "Do you know what happened?"

"Hai, very well."

Hiko spotted Kenshin's eyes, a violet, and a kind shade of violet, not amber. Had- had he...changed?!!!

A/N: Short, sorry for the scare. Till next time, KenSan out!


	5. Back, And Stranger Than Ever

A/N: OMFG! Alright! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! That you all! I can't believe this! Yay! Okay, here you are.

**Back, and Stranger Than Ever**

It had been only a few hours since Kenshin Himura had been released from the hospital. Hiko glared him down, but watched him carefully as he thought about what happened when the child came to him. Kenshin was one of the most different people of his type that Hiko ever encounter. So...intriguing.

-- four years ago

Hiko paced, and had been doing so for an hour after he received a call from the social worker Shura. He was making a rut in his carpet. It was a strange thing. He guessed the reason most that he wanted to do this was...it was really hard for him to admit, even to himself.

Biting his nail, Hiko thought about her. The beautiful woman that he once called anata. She died, years ago, what had to be a decade, along with their to-be son. He closed his eyes and sighed gently. Thrusting to the window as a car door slammed, a young woman with greenish hair walked out, a red-head dragging behind her with a police officer._'Oh__ what have I gotten myself into?' _Hiko asked and bit his thumbnail again. He walked to the door and opened it, greeting Shura properly and allowing her in. The child was behind her, thirteen years old, and a cold as steel gaze.

"Come on Kenshin," Shura commanded. She coaxed the officer back to the car, assuring him that everything would be alright. Hiko showed her to the couch and she took a seat, Kenshin at the polar end.

"Would you like something to drink?" Hiko asked politely, his throat was getting dry as the child stared at his carpet.

"No, thank you," she glanced around. "A very nice home Seijuuro-san." she admitted marking something down on a sheet of paper.

Hiko didn't answer. If she was pleased with his home, then it was good enough for him. "You have quite a responsibility on your hands. You know that, right?" she asked looking deep in his eyes.

"Yes."

"Kenshin had been through quite a lot, you need to be easy on him." Hiko nodded and looked past Shura to the boy who continued to examine the home. His clothes were a little torn, and he had a jacket a few sizes too big. His hair was knotted and a bandana at his forehead. When he looked at Hiko, there was the sudden realization that his eyes glowed amber and were bloodshot.

"So..." the black-haired man began, Shura still concentrating on finding the correct material to tell him "….is there anything you enjoy doing?" the redhead was taken aback and stubbed his toe in the carpet. This was a hard question for him to answer. Looking behind her, Shura waited for him to answer which seemed as though it were never going to happen.

"Um..." his voice rasped. He looked at Hiko again, Shura already beginning to speak in his place.

"He has had both physical and emotional trouble. Therapy will be needed, provided by us of course." Shura was oblivious to the fact that Hiko's mind was still set as Kenshin gathered his words.

"Um...I like to play guitar..." he said shyly, and then gaining a rougher tone. "And I like to fight."

No surprise. None whatsoever. He had lived on the streets for three years. Fighting was a must.

"Anything else?" Hiko asked. The child turned away and growled after a moment. A first warning flag was the gaze, a second now the growl. The social worker paid no heed and continued to look over her notes summoning Kenshin forward.

She stood, her height over his, but his growth had not yet occurred. She straightened out his jacket and wiped of his face of any grease. Placing a hand on each shoulder Shura nudged at him forcing him to say something.

"Konichiwa," he mumbled, hands still in his pockets. Shura nudged the boy again who returned with a glare and another growl taking a hand out as to shake. Hiko put his large around the small, completely covering it. Kenshin's hands were callused and scarred badly. The demeanor the child owned harnessed many forms of hate and it was colder than the farthest south country. Shura looked down at him as she flattened his hair smiling.

"I ask you again. What else do you enjoy as a hobby?" Kenshin flared.

"If I don't answer doesn't that mean I have nothing else to tell you ya old goat!" Kenshin yelled and was restrained by Shura.

"Manners!" she roared to him.

"Smart you are? And a very, very lose tongue. This will prove very interesting." Hiko stood and moved Shura who was very unsure when he forced her away. "Now. What are you hiding? There is a hobby you haven't told anyone, if you tell me I'll try my best to feed the interest." Kenshin held his tongue to Shura's surprise. Stubbing his toe again, he pocketed his hands and rasped out:

"I...I like to...read..." Hiko smiled giving a hearty chuckle.

"That wasn't hard to admit was it?" Hiko squatted, his face to the child's who cringed and took a step back. "There's nothing to be afraid of. Give me a little more help. What kind of books? Genre?" Hiko asked. He mused at what the child would say. It was really a bit shocking when he heard that Kenshin liked to read. A fighting punkish kid reading.

"Um..." Kenshin never had this attention before, but he answered knowing this would turn out for the better. "Action-adventure or...biography." Hiko nodded.

"What a selection." Hiko said standing fully. "I will do my best for his care." he shook Shura's hand.

"Hope you can handle him. He's a real firebrand," Shura began to walk out. "If you need me," she left a card on the table and shut the door.

--

Kenshin was an intrigue; a rough-housing, sharp-tongued intrigue. He was an intrigue before the accident, and he was even more so after the accident. He was quiet, and polite. Not that he wouldn't have his rough moments, there was no doubt that that would happen. What with his past and all. But he was too much changed. Hiko liked the quiet though.

At the moment, Kenshin lay downstairs since he returned, reading as Hiko remembered. That was what brought up that small memory. Really, Hiko didn't try to think about the past; when he got Kenshin. It was harder to think about because it was closer to when everything happened. Shaking his head Hiko stood and went to his room to go to bed.

The next morning, Kenshin emerged from the basement, his sisters greeting him. His face was covered by his thickest knots of hair, and he was making no attempt to tie it up. "Are you going to school like that?" Kenshin sat at the table as Hiko served them breakfast. It was his turn to cook. "Silent treatment?" Kenshin hummed low as he picked at it taking several bites before her did finally pull a hair behind his ear. Hiko saw the displeasure on his son's face. The blood-stained cloth still covering over that cross shaped gashes was hard to miss.

"I'm going." he announced and stood starting for the door.

"Bye! Nii-san!" Kenshin gave a tiny wave to the girls and then the door slammed. Glancing to the living room Hiko saw Kenshin speed off, and he didn't take his jacket as it still hung on the rack.

It was a weird feeling. Something was washing over him. Regret? Anger? Yes, he was drunk, but with pride like his there was no way he would admit it if he didn't have to. That was what had him worried him; Tomoe. She would be a problem. She was a main gossiper at school, especially tarnishing the reputation of her former lovers. Strange how he, the one to always think two steps ahead, never planned anything like this. Shows how stupid people get.

He reached the school and as usual, it was packed. His group sat in there normal spot talking. Tomoe was with the girls smiling and she was right in the middle. '_Hell__ on Earth,'_ Kenshin thought to himself. It wasn't like he hadn't been in that position before.

Sanosuke was the first to turn his head and notice the leader jump off his bike. Stuffing his hands in his coat pockets, Sanosuke casually walked over and greeted his friend who remained silent like before. "You alright? We were all worried." Nothing. Silence and as much as quiet Kenshin could be; this was like a cold shoulder quiet. However, there was an aura. An unidentifiable calm aura that made him seems so much kinder.

"Ah, Battosai." the horrid nickname Shishio gave him after they learned it in Social Studies. There was another rumor that Kenshin had actually killed somebody "You woke up on the wrong side of the bed or something?" Shishio asked when Kenshin turned away and just gazed at the world like it was new.

"Buddy, are you alright?" Sanosuke placed his hand on Kenshin's shoulder.

"I'm fine. I want to be left alone." Kenshin crossed his arms.

"What's wrong with you? Why do you have your hair down?" Sanosuke pulled back the veil shielding his face. He saw the bandage and Kenshin automatically turned. He didn't want anyone to see. No one. It was pure humiliation. He felt it. A flare that he had never felt before for years. He raised his fist, his body on autopilot. He felt the contact, but by then he widened his eyes and began to pull back his arm.

Sanosuke fell to the ground. The school stopped. Every student looked at what he did. His head wretched to them, and then to his friends. Kaoru had arrived and looked. She expected a grin and a laugh, but he recoiled putting his hands to his mouth and watching as Sanosuke didn't move. "What did I...?" he didn't know why he did it. It was scary. He watched blood drop to Sanosuke's lip as he lifted up, and as he did Kenshin turned around and began to run with not a one of destination. The grass was wet and he was so caught up in jumbled thought he trip and slid dirtying the knees and his hands. His face was down in the mud just trying to act as though he could burrow and hope to hide.

A warm hand touched his back, and larger footsteps were behind. "Himura?" the voice was a girl. "Kenshin?" he lifted to show his face. She had began to pull out a handkerchief and wiped at his face to get rid of the mud. There was a whimper, and Kaoru looked into the boy's eyes. This was the gang leader? The smart mouth? He didn't look like it. He, right now at least, was a scared little puppy that had been kicked one too many a time.

The shaky gaze, as though he was more in thought, turned to Sanosuke who wiped blood that dribbled down his nose on his sleeve. Kenshin lowered his head and stood. Without thinking, Kenshin placed his head on Kaoru's shoulder. "Gomen..." he whispered. There was a teary mix.

"Nani?"

"G-gomen," he said more steady. Sanosuke pulled Kenshin away, and looked him straight in the eye. Kaoru looked at people who were still gaped in awe watching the show.

"What in seven hells is wrong with you?!" Sanosuke yelled as he shook him.

"I-I don't..." he choked and then shoved away. He had to run. He had to. No tripping, no apologies. Just running. Running to get away. Away from life, away from the fear that he never thought he'd have before. His emotions were too mixed. His mind was imbalanced. He needed freedom. Like before. Freedom from what he called a life. All he did was made it to the wall though. His hands grappled it, and it took all his energy to not let his knees buckle. He was breaking down, way down. He didn't know who he should be. What should he be? He couldn't be what he was. And the mistakes. He clutched it even harder and yelped as a hand touched his shoulder.

"Don't be scared of me," the soft voice cooed. "What are you sorry for?" she watched those eyes. She could see things. Things she didn't want to see. Things she didn't want to know. He was telling her his past. His troubles and sorrows. She knew by the rumors. But that was all they were to her. Rumors. "Calm down. Okay?" she asked. Kenshin sucked in a breath. "Good, feel any better?" Kenshin didn't answer as he regained his strength and nodded to her. Kaoru did quake at what she thought she saw. The violence. It was shocking that he would still live.

She watched him walk away and say something to Sanosuke, almost like he pleaded. Sanosuke more than eager took what he said and walked him to his car. They were all there early. "Kami-sama..." she muttered leaning on the wall. She always thought he played bad boy. But he was nothing like you saw in the movies. Nothing. Kenshin's body was back, but his mind wasn't even close.

A/N: Creepy, and I'm sorry if you guys read other things. I've had this one on my mind more. Well, I hope you enjoy, till next time. KenSan out!


	6. Deal

A/N: Again...OMFG! You peeps are like so awesome I swear. I didn't think this would ever get this popular. I really hope that you enjoy this next chappie. Sorry if it might sound sorta cheesy.

**Deal**

Kaoru could hardly keep her body straight as she watched Sanosuke talk to a lethargic looking Kenshin. What a feeling of torment. She took a real deep breath closed her eyes and pulled a loose hair behind her ear as she clasped her books at her chest.

"Kao?" a younger, freshman voice asked. Kaoru looked over to a young girl with brown hair that rested near her shoulders. A friend of hers that was practically a sister and stayed at her house all the time, Tsubame.

"Yeah?"

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I was...I was just thinking."

"Wasn't that the guy you said stomped all over your book?"

Kaoru examined her face which was very quizzical and expecting of an answer. Finally, Kaoru was shoved into answering and said:

"Yeah, but he's hurt. It's okay." Kaoru tried to say barely making a smile.

"Hurt?" Tsubame glanced over at Kenshin who was laying on the picnic table hands neatly folded on his chest. "How? I mean the cut this but besides that?"

"Emotionally Tsubame." Kaoru began to go into the school, Tsubame at her heels. "Very..." she murmured.

Through the day, Kaoru saw Kenshin but didn't seem to look at him quite the same way. It was hard to. How could someone give you so much information in a simple glance? Thought she had to admit it was a glance that you don't see everyday. Kaoru shook her head and erased the thoughts. It was impossible, but she set her mind on other details. In her classes though her eyes wandered to the red head because just like she he was in most honors classes.

When lunch rolled around Kenshin made his way to the back that was practically infested with cobwebs. He went to wallow in self pity, and his hand hardly left the bandage where blood had stopped but still showed the cross underneath.

Kaoru got out of line and gazed around. She sat with a small group of friends. Unlike most of the cheerleaders, even though she put on a fake facade, Megumi Takani was who she sat with along with Misao Makimachi. Hey, friends are friends right? But today she questioned herself. Should she sit with her friends, or should she help sit with Kenshin just to comfort him?

That word was strange. Comfort. A person like him needing comfort. But everyone had their times. Making up her mind Kaoru walked by her friends and over to the back looking down at Kenshin who had propped his feet onto the seat. She sat in an open place next to him. Sanosuke rose his head from his tray took look at the girl as did Aoshi. Shishio growled slightly and turned away. The temperature dropped for a moment and Aoshi stood only to sit back down when Kenshin motioned him to.

"What brings you here?" Sojiro as smiling. He had to say it seeing as the only conversing they were doing was an eye contact one.

"Um..."

"Hey, jou-chan doesn't need a reason right Kenshin?" he never lifted his head as he poked at lunch which was an American meatloaf surprise thing. It looked disgusting. "Come on, quite with the silent treatment," then a grin grew on his face. "He won't last long jou-chan. He always had to put his two-bits in. Even though his word doesn't mean jacksh..."

"Don't make me do something you'll regret." Sanosuke laughed and took a large chunk of his surprise.

"Works every time." that confident smile beamed. A growl emitted from Kenshin's throat as he continued to color in a drawing. Sanosuke tried to look but Kenshin only turned away. Kaoru was the only one capable of looking and she smiled when she saw it looked really nice.

"Neato."

"Okay," Kenshin began." if you're going to keep your pretty butt here then no more words like 'neato' got it?" Kenshin asked. Rougher mood than earlier.

"Hai." Kaoru smile and stood deciding to throw away the lunch no one seemed to like.

"You're being sour." Again he tried to look but Kenshin turned further. "Geez, calm down would ya?"

Kenshin put the markers away and threw the sketchbook across the table to them. Sanosuke grabbed it as Kenshin stood to leave.

Aoshi had too looked. It was hard not too. All of them told Sanosuke to open it. When he did they passed many drawings that they always saw but when they came to the end there was one that they never really did. It wasn't graphic or torturous. It was them, the whole gang nicely colored and looking like they were having a fun time. But Sojiro was the only one that seemed to notice. In the portrait where Kenshin drew himself there was a hole in the middle of chest. Correction. A hole where the heart should be. Each of them shrugged and admired the drawing more.

Sanosuke tucked it under his arm and looked around the room as he stood to leave. No one else in the group really knew Kenshin like he did. He was the only one that had a clue what was behind all punk and under the shell.

Kenshin leaned on the wall. His body ached from the days before and he was sweating a little. The bile still stung at the back of his esophagus and he tried to calm down. All eyes watched him like the moment he did or said anything wrong someone would ring out. Paranoia eh?

His stomach churned at the sound of dainty steps behind him. He seethed and forced himself to turn and confront the horror that had done this to him. But not only was it Tomoe but her new pretty boy Akira. Something long ago had shouted 'affair'. Her dark eyes went sharp on him. "My dear that's a lovely look for you. A mummy. "

" You're not funny," Kenshin managed out." So stop trying to be." Kenshin turned not wanting anymore of this. Apparently Tomoe wanted more. She tried to heel him, only for Kenshin to move out of the way in the nick of time.

"Stop right there Battosai." Kenshin lulled his head to one side as he turned around and raised his hands as to mock Akira who thought he was a superhero.

"Ah, Tomoe's lackey Kiyosato. Hmm." he laughed as he crossed his arms. He was scared this morning, but it was his friend. This however was a matter of retaliation.

"Well isn't it Mr. Smart Mouth."

"Flesh and blood."

"Punkass trying to be cool? You're probably too scared to fight me," Tomoe had crossed her arms and watched as boyfriend and ex-boyfriend bickered their wittiest banter to one another. Soon she pulled out her compact. Kenshin had to say something even though Tomoe was the most beautiful thing he set eyes on.

"Showed him the ghoul behind the make-up yet?"

Tomoe shut the compact so fast that it echoed off the room. The groups laughed and off course there was no teacher in the room at the moment.

"Watch it. I have friends in small place..."

"Shut that boastful mouth of yours Akira. Ever member on that football team of yours tried to get into my group; miserably might I add. And let us not forget your sluggish performance. For a wide-receiver you are dreadfully slow."

Akira snapped and gritted his teeth. Settling this like men sounded so much better. He locked onto Kenshin's face and let his fist fly. Kenshin only lulled his head to both sides cracking his neck in the process and dropped low as to avoid. Akira tried to go for it but then Kenshin had already sent his leg in a sweep locking the ankle for impact. Akira tumbled into the lunch tables. Man did a fight with not liquor involved feel good. Akira started to tear off his letter jacket only fort Kenshin to stomp his foot into Akira's chest.

"You think I'm some under-educated hack that all he cares about his fighting, ne? Well think this: If I like to fight that means I'm good at it. And you, well, you haven't changed from those years ago. Here's a tip for you; get better before you fight me." Kenshin removed his foot and Akira sucked in as much breath as he could. Tomoe dropped to Akira stroking his head and eyeing the new design on Akira's shirt.

Shishio walked by her and smiled down. "Himura's hand-work. I have something for you little miss." Tomoe stood with Akira and tweaked a brow.

"What do you want?"

"I think I can give you some inside info."

"Why would you help us? What do you want?"

"I know that you don't like Himura. And I know that I don't like Himura. So why not help?" Shishio shrugged. Tomoe was hesitant as the man held out a bandaged hand. Tomoe looked to Akira who was dusting off his shirt and then asked:

"May I join this little charade?"

"Why not? The more the merrier," Shishio shrugged again. Tomoe finally smiled and took his hand with Akira.

"Deal." and she shook with a tad bit of grimace on her face.

A/N: It was short, but it will get the point across. I will try to make future chapters longer okay? Well, I hope you like. Till next time, KenSan out!


	7. Emotions, Emotions

A/N: Not interesting chappie. I know. Informational for what too come. Kay? Now, let us continue, ne?

**Emotions, Emotions**

Kenshin sucked in a breath. It was hard to believe what he had just done in front of his peers. He'd have to admit, he had a rather short fuse. No one who fought him ever thought they could just beat him with one punch. Not with his record.

He fingered at the bandages on his face. It hurt pretty badly, but he ignored the pain. As he stroked it, he pushed his fingers under the gauze just wanting to ripe it off and wakes up in a drunken slumber at the party.

Opening his locker after he got out of the sea of stares in the students, he shuffled through his books and found a small notebook sandwiched between the math and science.

"Why do you hide yourself?" an unknown voice asked.

The red head jumped to turn and look at the raven-haired woman before him. He never got the chance to _look_ at her, especially because of her status on the popularity pole.

Anyone would call her flat-chested, but that was untrue. Her thick layers of hand-me-down like clothes had hidden what was under the surface. She had kind round sapphire eyes that looked at you, past your appearance and straight to what your soul looked like. High cheek bones complimented her heart-shaped face. And Kaoru may be childish and outgoing, but ugly and stupid were not on that list, not by a mile. The bigger problem to this was Tomoe would do anything to make sure that no one saw the true beauty another girl had. Especially when they had the chance to shine over her. She'd destroy them with rumors, just like she did Kaoru.

"That's no concern of yours." Kenshin slammed the door of the old rusted silver locker hoping it might scare her off.

"I know it's not; maybe I should?" she slid down the cold lockers as he did and examined the almost illegible scrawl of kanji across the lines. "What are you writing?"

"Nothing."

"Doesn't look like nothing to me," Kenshin gripped the pen harder but refrained from breaking it as he slammed his against the locker behind him. "Don't hurt yourself." Kaoru coaxed.

"Oh hush." said Kenshin standing. "I've been hurt much worse."

"Like when you fought Sanosuke?"

Kenshin stopped at those words and his heart pounded. He knew there were spectators, but they were routing on who would win. Why would someone like Kaoru be watching? In a place where he fought which were practically the slums.

"How would you know?" She stayed at his side and examined his face before sighing.

"I watched from a distance. You two were reluctant to stop." she commented. Only thing she received was an angered glare that wanted more of an explanation. Clearing her throat Kaoru went on." And I was the one that had called the ambulance or one of you would have died of blood loss I'm sure."

"I still have the scars..." he whispered hoarsely placing his forehead to the locker. She glared back at her raising his voice. "Why am I telling you this?!" Kaoru grimaced under the rage.

Sanosuke broke the glaring contest by asking Kenshin: "Why'd ya go bud?"

Turning from Kaoru Kenshin began down the hallway with his friend only glancing back at Kaoru as she made her way back to the lunchroom. "Nice sketches by the way," Sanosuke handed Kenshin back the tattered book. He fingered it and tucked it under his arm looking at Sanosuke as he started to speak again. "So, what did jou-chan want?"

"Nothing. She was just being nosey." The words stung and he hardly managed them out knowing it was so much more than that.

"Nosey or concerned maybe?" Kenshin didn't respond and wanted to turn away. Hardly did Sanosuke pry this deep in a situation that it did not require. "Oi, you listenin'?"

"Not particularly."

That word. **Concerned. **What a hard word. But why was it associating with both him and Kaoru? How could they connect with a word such as that? The last thing Kenshin ever believed from Kaoru was concerned. He always thought she's be the one to kick him while he was down and rather spit in his face and watch him bleed to death on Megumi's patio. And she was the one that had called. Sanosuke had said he did. Why was she trying to comfort him? Why was she concerned? Was it the wound? Or maybe the emotional change that he saw?

"You keep putting your hand to your neck. The scar is gone you know?"

"Yeah, but it seems like its still there."

"I said I was sorry man. The choke hold wasn't supposed to kill your breathing or nothing." What Sanosuke was walking about was he had made it hard for Kenshin to breath and there was a surgical tube put in his throat for a day or so when he had stopped. Sanosuke was a bad opponent, not one he'd like to go up against again.

"That fight was fun though. Since we know each others moves and stuff we'd have to think of different strategies. "

"Yeah..." the moment was lost. Sanosuke took his arm from Kenshin's shoulders ad dropped them at his side.

"I...Dad's concerned..." Kenshin jolted his head up as they slid into the men's room.

"Sozo?"

Sagara Sozo was Sanosuke's adoptive father. The things that really made these two click were that they had that in common. Sozo had taken Sanosuke on when the boy was only eight. The thing was these two were different in a few places. Sanosuke was a much uncivilized kind of guy, while Sozo tried, hence the word _tried_ to make him learn etiquette. Sozo was a police officer though and they had the fighting thing in common, but Sozo wouldn't pick a fight with just anybody. "How...?"

"He thinks it's coming back. He sees the old marks and the new...cuts bruises... he thinks that my outlet now is not enough..." Kenshin let his bangs shadow his eyes and he sighed heavily." Does it seem like it to you?"

Sanosuke followed suit, closing his eyes halfway and crossing h is arms. The silence was unbearable, but they seemed to be able to bear it. Finally Sanosuke said: "I don't know. I'm not a doctor. He looked to Kenshin and then asked: "What do you think?"

Kenshin responded to it quickly." I'm not sure. It's like you said, neither of us are doctors..." he trailed after pushing up from the wall. "Then again...a mask can hide a lot of things."

Kenshin exited, not wanting to be in this room of what seemed mourn. Sanosuke understood. But why now of all times was it returning? Why now? His teen years were supposed to be the best years of his life yet...they were being crushed by something so easily caught. Placing his hands on each side of the sink Sanosuke looked at his sagging appearance. His normal happy demeanor had begun deteriorating and he knew why. He had been hiding it because it was easy around his friends, but now...

Removing the bandanna, Sanosuke looked at an inscription in a sharpie. It read: _Higashidani_. That was his biological father's last name. His old last name. But it was a hard name to hold anymore. There were too many memories. His father had died along with his little brother and sister in a bad head on collision. He was quickly adopted up. The only thing he had left was this headband that was retrieved from the crash that was well preserved. It was now a memento of what he once had.

Tying it back on. Sanosuke slapped a smile on his face. With that he said to himself," Grin and bear it Sano. Grin and bear it."

--

The last few periods of the day were as followed: Boring, boringer, boringest. Mind was adrift basically through math, gym, and literature. Weeee. Kenshin was twirling a report in his fingers. Book reports. An A- because had forgotten punctuation in a few places, but he was complimented on the opinions and deep theories. As he read the compliment he raised a brow. What would the punctuation thing matter? He was just going to throw it away sooner or later. He hadn't really put any mind into it.

"And people say procrastination is a bad thing."

"Himura-san, correct your posture," he did. No wise cracks, no slumping further, nada. Everyone was silent too. Crossing his legs he began to write in the notebook. 'A Memoir of a Freak,' was what he titled it. He had he cover page marked too. Hey, people think others had it bad, read this. Sure the language wasn't kind and there were adult themes. You want the truth right? There was nothing but it here.

He'd started it years ago writing the things that he could remember as a child was real hard. With the little trips to the candy shop in between you ask? No. When birds swim with fish. "Himura-san," Kenshin rose his head slowly. "To my desk," the class laughed and 'ooooo'd' at him as he stood and trekked over stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"And?" he asked lulling his head to the side so his hair covered the bandage.

"I need to speak with you about your journals."

She took him outside of the classroom closing the door. This was very odd. "Did you not enjoy what I wrote Tanaka-sensei?" he asked the older woman. She was too busy flipping through the pages until she got to the last and put her finger to a line putting it in his face saying:

"Read this."

"What's wrong?"

"Read it please Himura-san," Kenshin scanned it and gulped. It wasn't bad, but it was deep. He snatched the book from her and began to read the scrawl. The topic was ' Childhood' and they could have written anything that was more than a page long.

"Whoever_ said home was where the heart is never was a foster child or in their shoes. They only see a warm family by a fire, but when __you're__ a child such as this then home is a word that you just can't __caress_." Kenshin stopped as the sentence did. "Happy now?" he asked sourly.

"I understand these things must have been...rough. Public is the last place you'd like it...but the essays are nothing short of remarkable."

"Publish? Pish. The last thing I want to be is swarmed. Last thing I need is pity from strangers."

"I now you must spit at the idea but..." as she had taken it back Kenshin had ripped out the last three pages that had the essay on it and started inside. It was very rude to do to the teacher, but his thoughts were for him and him alone.

Sitting down and watching the teacher totter in, Kenshin slammed the papers in his memoir notebook and listened as the teacher continued to lecture.

Kaoru on the other hand looked at him almost in misery. Sure, he didn't want pity, but it was hard not to give it to him. She saw more than anybody else, not to mention that fight between him and Sanosuke which Kenshin was battered to his last breath. Truth be told, she went to the hospital and left an anonymous thing of flowers and a balloon for him just so he would get better. Kenshin never knew. She would never tell him how much she liked his personality, how much she thought he was cute. She just couldn't. He was rough and tough. She guessed maybe like coal...if it went through enough pressure soon it would be a diamond. That was it. He would shine, and she planned to make him that way.

A/N: I have questions! I want answers! What do you think is wrong with Sanosuke?! What is returning! And, would you let your literature teacher publish your personal thought? Please, I want to know. Well, till next time. KenSan out!


	8. What Is Love?

A/N: I read over..., way too many mistakes. I didn't re-read it well enough. Okay, if you can't guess what's wrong with Sano then I won't tell you. You'll just have to piece it together yourself. Thanx for reviewing peeps. Here we go!

**What Is Love?**

Kenshin barely said a word when he left the school. His friends just stared at him when they saw him head for the bike. No one budged. No one came over and grabbed his shoulder. Not in the mood that they sensed he was in. Not right now, not after this morning

As he drove, Kenshin hardly kept his mind on the road. His sight was bleary and double-vision. Had his conscience finally blasted him in the face? His stomach churned, nausea rippling over him and even with cold air hitting his face sweat poured. He swerved and expected impact. The bike bumped over the sidewalk and he hit the brake hoping it would stop.

Opening his eyes after squeezing them shut, Kenshin set his foot in the grass to make sure he didn't keep moving. He must have been at least a block away from where he lived. Glancing behind him, he cringed to see he had dug up part of the yard. He was dead, that was for certain. Cursing heavily under his breath he shut off the bike and laid his head in his arms taking a few deep breaths. There was a rickety door slam that caused him to shoot his head up and glance at a man.

"Well, what has rolled into my lawn?" he asked starting over. Kenshin ducked his head and bit his lip. Since when was he scared? Closing his eyes, he climbed off and held onto it cracking one eye to see the man cross his arms and look behind the teen. There was a siren in his ears and he placed his hands on his head afraid of being arrested again. The man gave a laugh at the bike toppling over. He expected a yell as the man opened his mouth but it was joking-like. "As if my yard wasn't bad enough. Bike tracks. Lovely, "he glanced up to Kenshin. "Take your hands off your head I'm not going to do anything to you. But I ask how old are you exactly?"

Kenshin obeyed and picked up the bike answering: "Seventeen."

"Seventeen? Now I see why you can't control that thing. Kids shouldn't be driving. I don't let my daughter yet." The man took the bike and set up the stand keeping an eye on Kenshin as though he might actually do something. "Where were you before you ran into my yard? A party?" he asked stepping inches away from the red-head. He shook his head after looking at the teen up and down. "You couldn't have. You're as clean as a whistle aren't you?" Kenshin wasn't intimidated, but he was shaking slightly. "Park in the drive and come on in. Settle down before you drive again."

Obeying the man, Kenshin put it behind a blue pick up truck and followed him in. "So, what's your name kid?" the man asked shutting the door to reveal a very neat house. Everything was like it was perfectly aligned from the furniture to the pictures with children in frames. All before they were in their teens apparently.

"Himura Kenshin," he said walking up to the pictures and staring at them.

"Sounds kinda eerie. You some ex-con?" Kenshin whipped around and glared at the man who gave a hearty laugh. "Calm down, calm down. I'm only kidding," but his eyes were skeptical as he still examined the teens every movement. " Please," he offered," take a seat."

Kenshin sat on a soft couch sinking in slightly. He forgot to remove his shoes and stood putting them over by the door. Luckily the man didn't notice as he peaked into his kitchen and to a door.

"Oh, my name is Koshijiro. I'm sorry for not telling you. I'm being very forgetful these days." He walked into the kitchen for a moment leaving Kenshin in his silence. Why would he possibly be afraid? Everything was blurred together and he was scared. He really didn't even see the road. He was lecturing himself without words. Did that even make sense?

He twitched at the sound of Koshijiro yelling out. "Children! We have a guest. Will you please come out!" he asked. Kenshin looked over to see that Koshijiro was no longer in the kitchen, but on his left side gazing at his cheek that was unveiled of his hair. He jumped slightly and crossed his arms to cover his heart that he thought everybody could see. "Gomen for startling you Himura-san." Kenshin scooted away. The guy was scary. He had dark eyes with a few wrinkles and his brown hair was tied back in a pony-tail at the top of his head. He looked back to the kitchen after hearing some rustling. "Hurry up!"

"Must you yell?" Kenshin asked massaging his temples when a headache began to form.

"Gomennasai, gomennasai." he said and stood. A boy walked out from a corridor north of them and stared at the red-headed guest who glared with deep amber eyes. He wasn't in a good mood.

"Uh...dad...who the guy. And why is he pissed off?"

"Yahiko-kun, what did I tell you about your language?"

"Gomen tou-san," he walked over and plopped next to Kenshin as though they were best friends. He smiled and looked up. "What is he here for dad?"

"He ran his bike into the yard," looking to the kitchen he started over and to the door pounding on it. "Get out here sweetheart! I want you to meet somebody."

"I'm coming otou-san!" she yelled out. Kenshin's eyes grew and he turned to look at the door as it opened. Tsubame walked out and looked to Koshijiro smiley. "Where is she?"

"Coming Koshijiro-kun," Tsubame answered walking in. "Hello Kenshin-kun." she bowed and walked over to the door prepared to leave.

_This household is strange. I wonder who the daughter is._ Kenshin asked leaning his head on the back of the sofa. He laughed and then looked to see Koshijiro looking at his bandage as though it were marvel. "What is so interesting?"

"Nothing, nothing." He threw his arms in the air and looked as the door opened in the kitchen. Though he didn't care, Kenshin looked just to see because he really didn't expect to see what he did. Apparently she didn't see what she saw either. Both of them came to each other, but Kenshin drew back quickly ready to depart.

"I-I have to go Kamiya-san. Arigato for letting me in..." he went out the door as fast as he could, Kaoru trying to follow after him to no avail. He was already on the bike and zooming off when she went outside.

"Kenshin..."

--------

Hiko looked out the door to his home looking for a late Kenshin. As much of a punk he was, punctuality was a good trait. When the tall man heard the roar of the bike he as assured the Kenshin would be there soon. A red blur pulled into the drive way, but he looked like he'd seen a ghost. He only walked past Hiko without a word dropping to the couch in his weariness.

"Well, I wonder what could have happened." Hiko asked curiously.

"Leave me alone kudasai. My day is horrible, you wouldn't be helping me out, and you wouldn't." Kenshin continued to rub his temples as he looked at the white plaster wall painted a light yellow.

"That bad? Seesh, you think I wasn't a teenager," Hiko said dropping next to Kenshin. He looked over snarling at the man but leaving it alone. None of it was that important to get angry at. "Okay, I see. Bad. So, what happened?"

"And you became a foster parent how?" Kenshin questioned about to stand when Hiko grabbed the bandage and ripped it off. "ITAI!" he yelled putting his hand to his face. "What the hell was that for?!" he hissed wiping his hand over the wound to make sure it wasn't bleeding.

"Doctor called, said it was okay to remove."

"That wasn't my ideal way." He said rubbing it.

Hiko raised a brow and out of the blue asked: "You have a fluttery feeling in your stomach?"

"Huh?"

"Fluttery? You know, like a butterfly thing?" Kenshin knew what he was insinuating. The red-head sat on the couch rubbing his cheek where a red mark still lay. Hiko eyes him rather perverted before adding: "Kenshin's got a girlfriend, Kenshin's got a girlfriend."

"You are so immature! I ask you again, how did you become a foster parent?"

"I hit something. Hallelujah!" Hiko said standing. Kenshin growled as Hiko went to the kitchen. When Kenshin walked past the tall man and too the back, Hiko knew where he was going. His place. His sanctuary. The roof.

With rain beginning, Hiko peeked out the window to se Kenshin climbing the fence that the morning glories grew on. Hiko laughed, and when Kenshin had firmly perched himself Hiko yelled up: "Check the gutters while you're up there!"

"Shut up old man!" he yelled back. Hiko smiled and laughed after thinking of a question.

"You're thinking the universe. Tell me when you're finished. And tell me what love truly is when you've hardly ever felt it,"

Kenshin put his head in his arms looking out to the bad neighborhood. Such a question to ponder as the rain pounded his head. He mused. Could he actually figure out the answer?

Kudasai: Please

A/N: Is he in love. Tell me what you think. Till next time. Ken San out!


	9. OVER MY HEAD

A/N: Yes, he did rush out of the kitchen quickly I mean come on people! You have to understand they are not a couple yet. But, it beings here and now. I promise you. I wasn't going to make it like they just explode together, nor was I about to creep it along like a slug. I'll get it in. These things take time. Well, here we go!

**O-V-E-R M-Y H-E-A-D**

The rain began a little light at first, the drizzle reflecting so much more than one person's feelings. The raven-haired mistress sat slightly down after she watched her classmate run out just at the sight of her. Even if they weren't what you would call ' friends ' couldn't he at least make it more discreet to her father that he didn't want much to do with her? He rubbed her thumbs on the glass of her drink looking out the back sliding door with mourn. It started to pelt the window heavily.

Koshijiro stepped into the dim light of the kitchen, Yahiko close behind. He didn't get what they would call the ' right vibe ' when the two classmates eyes met. Koshijiro wasn't going to let his daughter wallow like this. She didn't deserve it. He stepped in turning on the light and beginning into his kitchen as though it were nothing. Like he hadn't seen her in this state of self-pity. He began to cook, pulling out anything that might actually make his daughter feel better.

"Dad, how long did you stand there?" Kaoru asked looking over. Her eyes were sad, but a smile was one her face.

"Enough to know that you were sad," he said stirring something," what is it that boy has?"

Kaoru shuddered at the question and put her arms on the tabletop diminishing the smile. Her hand went through her bangs shaking it slightly before looking back to her father who acted just a little uninterested. That was all a part of his master plan. "He just a guy I don't get along with to well," but that was an odd explanation." He's a punk. Big one. Been arrested too." Koshijiro smiled slightly.

"Why does that make you so opposite of him?" Koshijiro asked coming over petting her hair for a moment. Kaoru only stared at the shiny tabletop before shrugging. "You need an excuse not to like him. You think he's a delinquent and therefore he's bad news?" Koshijiro asked trying to decipher his daughter's rather silent figure. She only shrugged. Ah, the teenager. A human anomaly. "What has he done to you that are so bad? Unless. . , no, not my daughter?" he asked with this keen eye. Kaoru tried not to look into those eyes that read her like a book.

"I guess, maybe. But my goal is to change him."

"Ah, make him a good boy? The kind you can get to sit and roll over?" her dad put his hands in front of him and panted like a dog. Kaoru just gave him this skeptical look like he was crazy.

"Dad..., I just want to make him like the diamond I knows in there." Koshijiro gave his daughter a look, but changed in seconds thinking of what she as trying to accomplish. Then, when the silence was too thick Kaoru looked over to her father and glared to get an answer out of him.

"Ah, darling, noble as it is. You understand that if somebody wants to change, it is easier to let them undergo it slowly. Don't push it on them okay? I mean that you can help, but don't make it seem like you want him to change that desperately."

Kaoru nodded very swiftly and watched her father turn away to dinner. His little rant was over; which meant that he had taught her something. Most of the time she didn't understand his lessons. This time she did. Let him at his own pace because it would happen eventually.

--

The red head had told himself that it was a good idea to get out of the rain. Even as he told himself that, his mind diverted to the thing that Hiko had told him to think about while he was up there. It may have been a mere joke in Hiko's eyes, but it seemed to hit home harder than he understood. Or maybe that was Hiko's intent. Shaking his heavily drenched head to what he was thinking about. He was going way too deep into the question. He did that a lot. That was what had made him such a great student.

"Love," he sighed out. His breath was very visible and unconsciously he was shaking. He bent his head to look at the stained shingles while he contemplated about the question. What was love when he had never really felt? That was true. Love was one of those emotions that were uncharted territory. The fist people that were supposed to love him and show him love were his parents. That really never came about. If they did love him, it was before he was capable of remembering it.

Without that love, it made him the asshole that everyone thought that he was. And that was just the cold, hard truth. Then of course the foster parents were suppose to love him, but he didn't get what he was suppose to, that was obvious. One had too many other foster children to care about the love he should have received. He drove that woman up a wall. Then there were families who tried, but failed miserably. It was just him not wanting it basically.

And what about the girlfriends? That was just a teenage thing. How many relationships ate actually based on the love in it? Kenshin was guessing that about 75 percent of teenage relationships were based on either looks or sex. He knew that much. Like him and Tomoe. It was a combination of both of those. He had his problems. He knew it. But when it came to a relationship, your partner would have to be able to take both the good and the bad. Tomoe wasn't that type. She wants a guy who has good looks and less brains than she does. That would be . . . brain-dead? Kenshin shrugged and laughed to himself.

But, if he didn't know what love was, would he be able to tell when he was actually feeling it? Kenshin was wondering about that. He had heard something like ' love was a feeling you feel when you're feeling a feeling you've never felt before.' Or some weird tongue twisters like that.

When the rain started pouring down and beating on his numb skin, Kenshin climbed down the fence of morning glories and looked into a foggy glass door where Hiko was trying to entertain Ayame and Suzume. He was that one and a million parent. That one that was so incredibly tough on the outside but so incredibly soft on the inside. He knew what had to be done when the time came. It was even though he never seems loving he was.

The boy stepped in dripping on the tiled kitchen floor kicking off his muddy boots and looking at Hiko with this hint of inspiration. The two didn't really have to show that little father-son moment, but it was there. The mood music and everything that had went with it and the 'awing' audience. The red-head walked past his father to go change into dry clothes. The larger man followed him and waited for his son to get dressed before walking into the clean room. He sat on the bed and waited for Kenshin to say the first word.

The silence was very stiff and Hiko sucked in a breath just waiting. Kenshin fumbled around with a few ornaments on his shelf and then picked up his sakabato in the corner holding it close to his person. "Anything kid?" Hiko finally asked realizing Kenshin wasn't what you would call eager to announce his true thoughts.

"I don't know." He murmured pulling out the sword for only a moment to see the glittering of the steel. He felt like this sword for many reasons. He was a weapon, and he was sharp. But he wasn't the weapon you'd want to use to kill somebody or seek a revenge. He was the kind of weapon that you would want to use to fight but not kill. To get your point across that fighting wasn't as much a part of you as people truly believed it to be.

"You don't know. You sat in the rain for fifteen minutes. You must have though of something," Hiko urged trying to not sound too desperate. Kenshin shrugged re-sheathing the sword and looking to the ceiling. "Do you at least understand anything?" Kenshin though and watched the ceiling blur for a moment when he squinted his eyes. Then he nodded very slowly setting the sword back in its corner. Hiko nodded in response and stood. That was all that he needed to know. With that he said: "I'll leave you be."

He made sure to go a little slower than usual. He knew teenagers; he was one once as shocking as it was. When he reached the door and was ready to leave he heard, "Wait." Hiko turned with a minor smile. The look on Kenshin's face had a weird array of emotions that you hardly ever saw in him. When he and Hiko locked eyes, he saw the past before his eyes and the questions that lie as the future was becoming.

"Why had you asked?" Kenshin asked unsure. Hiko didn't know how to answer. With a shrug he attempted to string something that made sense but was vague enough that Kenshin wouldn't ask any questions.

"I just saw that look in your eyes. Whoever this girl is has really made an impression."

He left real suddenly leaving the teenager to slide down the wall and think quietly to himself. Love? What the hell was with that word and why did it keep coming back to him when he tried to forget it? He just couldn't. Could Hiko actually be right? Scary thought, but maybe he was right.

How did he know that his son had an inkling with somebody? That feeling in the pit of stomach was really weird and he wanted to throw up on the spot. Her eyes floated in his head. How could she of all people get so deep? Did she understand him more than he thought? He something truly as tragic as what he had been through be understood more than a sob story to her? A real possibility. With a smile he rose from the wall and opened his door going down to the basement, sword in hand.

--

The next morning the schoolyard was a crowded as it usually was. The red-head, with his hair tied at the nape of his neck, looked at the groups that looked only once at him. Tomoe had begun spreading rumors. He walked forward and listened hearing a cheer in the distance. Tomoe was practicing with her group. There was a cheer that he hadn't heard usually. He looked as people parted to one side. Tomoe cart-wheeled where he could see more than he wanted to. She looked at him in the face with her dark eyes running her French manicured nails over the cuts she had made. Her grin couldn't get anymore sinister. As her hand went down, her nails dug deeper and deeper dragging in the cut. She put her hands down and smiled.

"My sweet, my sweet. You were a treat, but I must bid adieu. Because you see you may love me, but I surely hate you." She turned around waving her hips seductively. She stopped and looked over her shoulder with a smile. "And I'm not the only one."

She looked at the student body who was staring at him hatefully. They whispered to one another and Kenshin just turned away like there was nothing wrong. This was just another stage in his life. And this was teenagers. When something juicier came along they would take that up and leave the things about him in the dust. It would take time. He was willing to wait that time. He walked over to his friend that looked at him funny.

"What did she say?" he asked looking at the student body.

"She said you abused her. She'll be a good make-up artist with her make-up. Made a very authentic bruise. "Sanosuke was more than willing to answer his friend.

"Domo."

"Yep."

Kenshin didn't get any further into it. That was all that he needed to know about what had happened. Smiling at the girl coming up he saw Kaoru coming very tentatively. Sanosuke jabbed Sojiro to show him and the way that Kenshin was looking at her the same way she did him. Unsure.

"Kenshin?" she asked. "Can I talk to you in private?"

He nodded. They walked over to wall and looked around to make sure that no one was listening. "I know what happened yesterday. Why did you dash?" Kenshin looked down to the mud that was fresh and splattered over his boots. He shrugged trying not to make any eye contact with her. It was hard with her very beautiful eyes.

"I don't know," was all her could get out. "Why?"

"I wanted to ask you something. I think I know that you know the way I must feel when I ask this. Stupid."

"Stupid? Uh oh."

"No, no. I just wanted to know if you would study with me. Exams and all. I have a bit of trouble in calculus." She admitted. Kenshin smiled to her.

"Yeah. Of course." He didn't know why it came out of his mouth like he was falling head over heels, but he was. He tried to disguise it by looking away.

"Can you come by my place then? It shouldn't be too hard to find. Bike tracks and all." She walked away. Kenshin placed his hand on the wall trying to stop himself from falling. The breath was taken right out of him. He looked to her walking and couldn't resist looking at her behind.

--

At lunch, Kaoru threw hers away and began down the hallway. Someone came up to her and put and arm over he shoulders. She tried to tug away seeing it was Shishio. He frightened her a little more than anyone else in Kenshin's gang.

"Little girl, I know what you can do for him. I know what he likes. "He started walking her down the hallway. "This will make you irresistible."

A/N: Finally. Now, what is he planning? You tell me. Till next time. KenSan out!


	10. Truths

A/N: Yes, boring, but I digress. Here we go!

**Truths**

Kaoru felt a little self conscious, and she had nervousness rattling off of her like no other. She looked at her door, plain, and then to her floor that was wood with carpet in the middle which she sat on. It was after school and she remembered inviting a certain punk to study with her. What a dumb idea that was! Did she really like this guy that liked to beat up people, just to show that he could? The kind that rode motorcycles, the kind that was a jerk and would irritate you just so he could. He was all those things. But he had these extra, unnurtured qualities to him. She planned on weaning those out of him first.

She combed her hair gently, looking in the mirror on the wall next to her. She was in front of it that way that, if he wanted to, he could look at anything extra. She pulled down her shirt and looked at herself one more time before laying out a calculus book. The door bell rang and she acted as casual as she could. She started to write on the paper and looked up. Her father neared the room, she heard his warm laugh. Kenshin's voice was almost emotionless. _Almost_. She heard a small sense of humor in him that forced her to wonder what he was thinking about.

The door opened and she went bright eyed at Kenshin, of course with that little hint of annoyance and, "I don't want you to be here," to it. He looked down to her and dropped his bag next to her book with a dull ' thump.' He was pleasant.

"I'll leave you two alone okay? I want this door cracked though." Kenshin nodded. He had this sense to him that said: "And you think were going to do what?" He walked out with a smile and his hands behind his back. Yahiko was behind there father and Kaoru gave a sour look to shoo him away. She rolled her head to the side to relax herself. He sat cross legged and removed his jacket. Out of his book bag came a graphitized notebook that he turned to a dog-eared page and started on a problem that was way down on the page.

"How did you get that far?"

"Class. I like to do it a little ahead of time, while she's trying to explain it to us."

Kaoru nodded. Kenshin was much smarter than she was. She tried her best.

"What got you stuck?" he asked, writing down a problem and trying to work it out. It was like his hand was mechanical, like he didn't even need to look at the page to know what he was doing.

"Some of it. She can't explain it that well. I'm not the only that gets stuck when she gets trapped..."

"You don't need help do you?"

Kaoru looked up at him in the middle of her rant and her smile fell. It wasn't that she was lying, but it wasn't that she was telling the truth either. He looked up at her with deep amethyst eyes that mesmerized her. She could see there was pleasure in them, but they never slid to the mirror that could reveal her backside. They were stuck on her face. Blushed rosy cheeks at what he'd just said.

"Um..., well, in a manner of speaking..."

"I get it. So, what did you want?" Kenshin asked sliding closer.

"Nothing, nothing...I just thought that maybe...we could talk." She said in a shrug.

"About?"

"You maybe?"

Kenshin was caught off guard. All that thinking that he had done the day before played out right here. Did he love, or didn't he love? And was it Kaoru that his heart skipped a beat too? That was strange. He looked to her again and she seemed almost confused when she looked at him. Like he had just grown another head.

"Did I upset you?"

_No,_ Kenshin mused, trying to keep his mind at PG level, _I was just taken off guard..._

"You didn't, kinda shocking though."

She shrugged.

"Shocking? Like wanting to know what you were pulled out of class for?" Okay...maybe Kenshin looked at it a little too deeply...

"She just wanted to talk about my stupid thing I'd written in my notebook. The journal. The home thing." He said. His intent on everything was to be as vague as he possibly could.

"Oh, what is your home like?"

"Nothing fancy, couple chairs, couple pictures. I have two little sisters..." he said.

"Really?"

"Ayame and Suzume? Why?"

"I didn't know."

"I never told," he said," and the there's Hiko."

"Hiko?"

"Adoptive father."

Kaoru thought the moment she heard _adoptive_. She looked at Kenshin for a moment. It was only a rumor all that Kenshin had went through at the school. How no one really knew everything, that they just made up stories to explain his cruelty. One said that his upbringing was by wolves. Another said that he was trafficking drugs. Then there were some that said he had no family. That his mother scarred him for life by stealing his virginity and then throwing him to the street. She shuddered at the thought. Kids talked, and they were crazy when it came to things that were abnormal.

"Adoptive? For how long?"

"About a year. Been with him forever though."

"Really?"

"Yep. He's annoying, but, you learn to love him."

"He sounds nice."

"I don't think you'd like the first impression you got. Most don't. He's big with a scary face." Kenshin wiggled his fingers and screwed up his face to make himself look scary, but Kaoru just started to laugh at him. "You think that's funny huh?"

"A little."

"My sense of humor is bad, or so I've been told." He said leaning on her wall. Kaoru looked at the mark that Tomoe had left. She made it apparent that he was her ex that was for sure.

"So, what was your life like before you go to Hiko?"

His head lowered, and this time Kaoru didn't have to ask, she could feel the uneasiness that Kenshin emitted from his person. He was thinking hard though. He never trusted anybody. Not will anything further than the facade that he put on so that no one ever knew who he was. So what reason did he have to tell this nosey girl? This girl that, until now, he had no feelings other than disgust toward.

The words were trying to force his way out of his throat, but they weren't making it all that far. He forced them done by holding his breath and biting his tongue until he could taste the metallic blood on the roof of his mouth. He drew his head up at the fear filled girl, her hand at her mouth as she asked herself whether or not she scoot toward and comfort him or back away and save herself from the obvious wrath that he would try and inflict upon her. His head went down again, and his hands went to his face, fingers on the bridge if his nose trying to massage the thoughts away. He swallowed the blood and left the past repressed as he could, the strings forcing it out of place and bounding into his mind, dancing and mocking the bad boy that he had been years ago. The yelling, the screaming, the torture and the blood that would fall in his eyes while he stayed with held breath in the darkness after he returned home from school. The corners of his mouth drew up slightly, but they were trying to push down and he had to bite his lip for the words not to come out. He looked up to her again with the pleading amethyst eyes, feeling his own hands shaking against his face. There was water, not tears, in the corners of his eyes. He brushed the hairs from his eyes and looked to her putting his hands down and taking a heavy breath.

"It was nothing a tender child as you could understand."

Kaoru was struck dumb. Him calling her a child, with the eyes of somebody that was years older than he actually was. The seasoned veteran of his own mind. But, she didn't have to wait for him to tell her anything. She could read his eyes just like the other time he let her. She was getting better at it now, and she saw what all the fuss he had just had was about. She saw the blood that would fling past his eyes every night and she had to close her eyes...

"It's scary;" she had to say.

"A horror movie?" Kenshin asked her. Kaoru had to think that if it would work or not to describe him. She started to crawl near him, and her hands went near his face, the freshly scabbed over marking. She started to move away, but he took her hand and made her stay. The water fell down his cheeks, it carving a new path down over the scar. It dripped to her floor, but he didn't think to wipe it away or even flinch to it. The hand he held was forced to go to his cheek, and she wiped the tears away herself.

"What..."

"Only you know the truth." He said real softly, his eyes glowed and the corners of his mouth turned up lightly enough that she saw something that no one everyone ever saw. He let her hand go and put it to her cheek then running it through her hair lightly then turning his hand away.

"Now," he said, as though nothing ever happened, "we need to continue, that we do."

Kaoru was just stunned.

---

The next morning, Kaoru, still lightly stunned by what had happened, looked in the mirror at what Shishio had said that Kenshin would like. She looked out her door, the home empty as her father went to work and her brother was still in bed, dooming to be late. She looked down and pulled out the trench coat in her closet to cover herself. She walked out on the stiletto heels, holding a bag of her regular clothes as she shook up her hair that fell down her back.

Kaoru had told her father that she would make her own way to school and though it took some time, she was able to get him to agree. She stepped out into the sunlight and went down the street holding her coat closed and passing many people on their morning walk or jog, or going to their work on foot or biking. The heads of any and all males turned her way, imagining what she was hiding under the trench coat. She smiled, if it got them, then it would get a guy like Kenshin easy.

She hopped onto the bus the rest of the way to her school and then stepped off with much time to spare. She walked in the line of trees before the school and looked around for Kenshin who was happily mingling with the rest of his gang while Tomoe and the other girls in her clique like they were punching holes into Kenshin and his crew. Shishio looked up to her, a grin cracking, noticing that she was dressed the way he old her to. Kenshin didn't notice this at all and continued to draw.

Kaoru was past the cheerleaders, and Tomoe was looking her up and down in a shocked fashion, her eyes more stuck on the stiletto heels no one would ever dream that she would wear.

"Um...Kenshin..." she said shyly as she stood in front of him. He looked up and sensed the fear in her. She let the coat go and she saw Shishio's eyes light up while everyone else's, Kenshin's included, went bug-eyed.

"How do you like it...?"

"Jou-chan!" Sanosuke was the first to say anything. She wore low cut leather pants, and a jacket. She had matching driving gloves that Kenshin wore, but the shirt was a light purple with heavy cleavage, threatening to rip off, as it showed her stomach as well. Kenshin stood up, but there was a mix of hatred and suspicion in his eyes. He grabbed her arms, and then she was afraid.

"Kaoru..." he asked, and looked down." What is this?"

"I was just trying to..."

"To what? Change yourself?" She saw that he was trying not to yell at her. But she shook even if he didn't. The cruel look in his eyes.

"I was just trying to make you happy..."

"Me? You think I like this? I know you don't."

"But Shishio said..." everyone's heads looked to Shishio who was still smiling demonically.

"Why? She's an innocent girl?" Kenshin demanded.

He merely shrugged. "I did as she said. I told her you would like it..." he said nonchalant.

"You know good well that you lied to her!" Kenshin roared. "Yet you told her! To what? Embarrass her?"

"Battosai, come now. I'm not that mean. I was just trying to get a few answers to my own questions." He said. "Is that so wrong?"

"She's not a pawn that you can use." He said and lowered his fists to his sides looking at the different side of Kaoru, almost blinded. And the raven-haired girl saw the disappointment and guilt in him. "Go change Kaoru-dono, before you hurt yourself further." He told her kindly.

"Hai."

She walked away wanting so much to run. All the while, Kenshin was debating whether or not to control himself against Shishio. He looked over his shoulder as Shishio lightly cackled to himself. "Why do you find it funny?"

"I like to ruffle your feathers sometimes. It's a good laugh."

"Is it now?"

"And I got my answer anyway."

"Answer...?"

"Of course. She's an odd catch you know. For you."

"Shishio..."

"Why do you hate the truth so much? I know that you like living in a lie, but that bubble's long burst, hasn't it?"

Kenshin turned his head away. There was no reason to say anything further. He bit his tongue and watched Kaoru step out looking better than she was before. And he looked back art Shishio knowing he had something to watch for.

A/N: Yeah...everyone hates the truth, Kenshin too...well, till next time...KenSan out!


	11. To Beat the Cold

A/N: I am free! I didn't get on for a few days and now I'm free as a bird. And with that...I want to update as quickly as I can.

**To Beat the Cold**

The next month passed without much of a care to anyone, and it was drawing into October/November territory. Kenshin, as usual was with his friends. There was a heightened sense around him though. A sense of uneasiness whenever he was around Shishio, or even when he was around Kaoru. It wasn't that he didn't like Kaoru; it was that he felt that he was causing her problems because of Shishio.

He wiped at the corner of his mouth were there was a small blood stain. He still got into small fights, but the joy and attraction to them was growing thin. There was always a thin little voice telling him that he should stop for all the wrong that he had done in the past. And, even if he spent his whole life doing that there was the nagging truth that he would never be able to.

Truth. The word stung at his tongue just saying it. The fact that Shishio was right about the attraction that he and Kaoru had almost instantly after he broke up with Tomoe. Whenever he had a problem that he feared to tell anybody else, he could go up to her and just look her in the eyes. She would bring him to a strong embrace and tell him that it would be alright. Kaoru was a sweet spirit that kindled his heart inside.

Now maybe she could make him feel warm on the obscenely cold day. He wore a scarf and had his head ducked into it even. But his body still shivered strongly. His arms wrapped around his knees and he scanned the yard. They should open the doors to the school any minute, but in the cold, minutes were hours. Before Kaoru could arrive, Tomoe walked over with that smug look on her face. But Kenshin had no hate toward her like he wanted to believe he did. She smirked for a moment and put her hands to her hips.

"This is pathetic looking. Waiting for your master like a dog now Kenshin. Guess you don't have the leash anymore." She laughed at her own joke that no one else thought was funny. Kenshin only shivered and looked to the road for that car to pull up with Kaoru in it. Tomoe still glared down at Kenshin, and she was waiting for him to lash out with his sharp tongue. She saw the eyes that were once always rocky and molten, a soft and calm violet that looked at her like a new innocent child on a playground.

"Tomoe...you're not accomplishing anything." He told her and put his head back down into the scarf.

He then looked up half expecting little snowflakes to fall out at anytime. Tomoe sat next to him on the bench, the whole gang looking over in unison waiting for Tomoe to do something that would humiliate their leader.

She put her gloved hands together and threw her hair over her shoulder. She seemed less aggressive than before, which made the red-head feel more open to say something. Turning his sights on her, he noticed the sulk in her body language. She pulled a hair behind her ear.

"Do you remember what caused this?" she asked softly, her voice was serious though. The boots she wore cracked the tough ground and then drew up like Kenshin's as she leaned her head on her knees. "I'd like to remember what made us both red-eyed..."

The sincerity in her voice was a small flag in Kenshin's mind, but if he opened to her just enough... You were mad at me for drinking I think."

"You're right. And I don't know why still. I never use to get mad...did I?"

Kenshin's shoulders drew up as he looked out to the parking lot. There was still no sign of his Kaoru to be found.

"I really don't remember...I think you didn't I don't really keep it in my head, that I don't."

"How much are you trying to forget?"

"A lot that is for sure."

"Will you forget about me?"

But there was a silence, but he had an answer. The car with Kaoru in it had just pulled up, the raven-haired girl automatically running as if something were wrong. The gang had long come to except Kaoru as one of them. It was like how Aoshi and Misao were together and Sanosuke still attempts at Megumi. Those were being ruled as hard to get rejections. Kaoru didn't explode at Tomoe like a girlfriend would or should at her boyfriend's ex. She smiled politely and bobbed her head and Tomoe did the same. When Kenshin drew his head from the scarf, Tomoe looked at the scar that she had left on him. Her eyes started to well for a moment.

"Gomennasai Kenshin..." she apologized. The red-head hung his head low, his eyes still pondering what he should say as they turned to look all over the ground. Through the muffled sound of the scarf he said.

"I'd love to forgive, that I would...but I'd love to forget as well. I can't do one without the other."

"I understand."

She stood and left without another word.

No one said anything for a moment. Sanosuke didn't like the silence all that well.

"So, that went well."

"..." Kenshin's silence was an agitating thing. He always went deep enough into though to make you believe he was in a coma. Kaoru replaced Tomoe's spot and leaned on Kenshin, her body-heat being shared with his. His eyes went to her and he leaned on her enough that they were both warm.

From the back, Shishio cursed his luck about Kenshin. It was thought that they would get in an argument, not that Tomoe would spill her feelings. But Akira was still up to the challenge, he knew that. And if Akira could do something then he would do something. That was that.

Kenshin released himself from Kaoru and started into the building with the flood of other students. It was apparent that he wanted to tell her something when he pulled her aside.

"How bad do you want to know?" he asked shyly.

"Know what?"

"I can tell you wanted to know a while ago...but...I couldn't tell you. What is it that you wanted to know?

Kaoru nibbled her lip gently and nodded. "Why are you on such a heightened guard? And, why were you afraid of people?"

Kenshin smiled. "I will be happy to tell you, if you will tell me why you wanted to help. It's more than just being a Good Samaritan."

"It's a deal then."

They nodded heads. "Meet me at my place tonight, better yet, I'll get you there? Alright?" Kenshin asked. Kaoru nodded. "That way, we'll both get our answers."

--

So each of them waited through every class, and to surprise they were thinking about each other. Kenshin's mind wandered so much, the teachers were not frustrated, but they were a little scared. They too had noticed the changes that the punk had gone through. One of the teachers even tempted herself to feel his forehead, of course to find it cool but shocked still nonetheless. Kenshin didn't say a harsh word to them, or back talked in a anyway shape or form. The teachers felt themselves being put in a parallel dimension. Kenshin had it worse. He couldn't explain his own behavior. But he thought to that night as hard as he could.

When he chased Tomoe around in that drunken rage, the mistake that he had made trying to strike her, threatening to kill her. He always hurt people back then, but never did he want to hurt a woman. That was for the real bastards in the world. Verbal was as far as he would hurt a female, and no further. But that night he felt something through him flow like a hot flame. But, as hot as it was then, it chilled his blood now. And then she got to him after pool. He deserved the cut for what he did to her. He touched the mark and traced it gently. The first line was deeper than the second. Tomoe had put her strength into that cut. He could almost out his fingernail in it by the width. His hands slide down his face and to his chest where his heart was pounding. Now he was beginning to feel sick to his stomach. All of that was coming to him without a moment's hesitation. And it hurt.

He lowered his head enough that if tears spilled he could cover then up. But they didn't. His eyes were blank though as he thought about it, and in that small minute span that he had fought with Tomoe, it played in his head a million times. Then, it stopped and he was able to raise his head. He was thinking about after she left the haze that she left him in. How his head turned to the side that day and his face was in the blood that spilled from the wound. He thought about it then too. But his eyes still held read in them. He was still mad at her for what she had done, yet that was when he was certain that his conscious had began to come to him. If not...then maybe now he wouldn't have had the courage to tell Tomoe that it was alright, and say what he did. And say it in the way that he did.

But school let out and he got his things and stepped out into that cold. It nipped at him hard and the wind chilled him more than the thoughts did. It broke through the tough leather of his old worn jacket and the scarf that he wrapped over his mouth and nose. Kaoru nudged his shoulder signifying that she was ready to leave. He had to wait for her to call home from the office to tell her father that she would be with Kenshin. And she assured him that Kenshin's father would be home and they would stay out of closed off places.

"I warn you...it will be cold but it's not too long of a ride." Kaoru just followed him to the bike and made sure her coat was zipped up. She didn't know where she should go when he sat on the bike. There was room on the back, but should she. Kenshin motioned her to come and she did. She held onto his waist like she saw other women on bikes do with their partners. Soon, there was a blaring sound and the bike took off. Now Kaoru wished she had heeded her father and taken the ear muffs. She was cold, that was right. Kenshin was also right when he said that they would be to his place fast.

He jumped off and helped her off, she saw the curtains swing shut and knew that it must have been Hiko that was looking out of them. From what Kenshin had told her, she expected something pretty strange, when Kenshin opened the door and let her into the heat, she was surprised to see him beyond the living room working on what looked to be pottery. She smiled; big guy, and odd hobby. Hiko looked up like he didn't know that they were home. He wiped his hands on his apron and stood.

Kaoru did her best not to drop her jaw at Hiko's height; he was tall sitting, but standing...

"K-konichi'wa Hiko-san." she said with a hand out.

"Who's the girl Kenshin?" Hiko asked his eyes skeptically on his son.

"This is Kaoru, I told you about her before." Kenshin said trying hard to make sure that Hiko didn't embarrass him in front of her.

"Oh...so this is..." Kenshin nodded," and you are..." he nodded again. Hiko got a grin on his face.

"Shishou..." Hiko just turned around.

"Hey, do what you want," he said with a hand up, but Kenshin didn't move an inch. Kaoru felt a tremble in him when he touched her, like he was afraid of something that Hiko would do. Sure enough, he came out with a book in his hand. Kenshin dropped to the floor.

"Is that a photo album?" Kaoru asked all peppy. Hiko just sat on the couch. Kaoru had to come over, leaving Kenshin keeled over on the floor, still in shock. So this is what it felt like to be a teenager. Kaoru saw that they beginning had just pictures of a teenager. But Kaoru knew why. As Hiko flipped on, she saw some pretty embarrassing. Hiko had no need to elaborate for her, there were things written underneath.

"Baka deshi...wake up before I pour water on you." Kenshin rose from the statuesque position he had fallen into and crept over uncertain. By the time Hiko had called him over, he was already done with the photo album which had more clippings of the paper than it did pictures. Kenshin took Kaoru's hand, his cheeks red from embarrassment. Hiko didn't have to laugh at his own cruel joke; he just looked at Kenshin with that same smile and turned his head away.

Kenshin pulled Kaoru down into the basement that had a few couches and old boxes of things. He sat on one of the couches, and then Kaoru followed suit.

"So, you wanted to know about my reckless past right? Well, okay, where should I start...? "

"From where ever works for you..."

So he did...

_--_

_There was a bit of fear going about the Himura household that evening. Of course the small boy was sitting quietly in his room. It still hurt from yesterday...the bruise that had formed on his upper arm was still very much there. He tried hiding it at school, even though in all reality, it was harder for people not to notice. He said he had fallen, and for a bunch of fifth graders, that was enough to explain bruises, but Kenshin himself couldn't bring it to explain. _

_He sprawled on the ground, his room sparsely furnished with only a ratty bed and a broken mirror. The window was covered with a board, and the door did have a lock on it. But today, the boy told himself, today would be the day that he fought back. But, he told himself that everyday, and everyday it never happened. The muscles in his stomach would knot hard to be able to with stand his father's hard fists, and everything would go into the defensive. The saliva in his mouth even coward away from everything and dried as he held his mouth closed. He let the fists pummel him, he was only a small child, and what could he do? _

_The footsteps came, and he tied the bandanna around his forehead tightly, his jacket on. There was a bag in the corner. He was ready to go. But, his father didn't come in directly. He made Kenshin wait in suspense for everything. This only tensed the boy up more and more. _

_As strong as the child acted on the outside, through the years and years of misery he was put through, and the pain that he had suffered, there was still that little baby inside, crying for his diaper to be changed, or to fill his empty stomach. And, back then he was unable to tell the compassion and the hate. He half expected that the rest of the world must have lived this way. He was in isolation after all; there was no way to tell. And he could ask his mother. That was just a smack waiting to happen. _

_He crouched down next to the side of the door. His fists clenched his sides. And the more that he thought about all that he wanted, the more that he felt his blood boil and his body itch to fight. But, his father's feet didn't come in until real late, when the boy was almost asleep. The glowing amber eyes of his father and the lavender of his mother were as menacing as they looked upon the sleeping child. He didn't cower this time. He merely stood and walked backward in his room._

_"Kenny...why __is__ you so scared of daddy?" his father asked. But Kenshin knew that trick to well. Come into the innocent parent's arms and then feel the breath squeezed out of you. That wasn't going to happen. Kenshin's feet moved for themselves. Almost appropriately, the thunder started to roll overhead. And the lights in the dingy home shook on and off at each strike. _

_"Are you scared darling?" his mother asked, she stepped forward. She was wearing stiletto heels today. That hardly bode well for the boy. But, with his stomach in that knot again, Kenshin made sure that his saliva didn't run away and he ran headfirst into storm. They both had wide-eyes, but his father grabbed him by his arms and pulled him back like a rubber band._

_" Come on, let daddy rock you to sleep tonight..." he snickered." You like that don't you..."_

_"Get the hell off me!" Kenshin hollered, and tears fell from his eyes as his father picked him up and held him in a head lock. His feet kicked against his fathers iron chest, but he kept kicking. His father's hands lifted the boy up slightly. _

_"You have a mouth don't you...better punish you for that too..." but before his father could do anything at all, Kenshin looked at his arm and bit him as hard as he could. His father barely took it as a threat at first, but Kenshin's teeth sank further and further. The blood rushed into his mouth with little trickles, and his father finally let out a howl dropping the boy to the ground. He was jarred for a moment, but there was no hesitation time. He turned over and kicked his father in the shin and rolled back to stand up. Still there were tears rolling down his cheeks, and his mother was with grit teeth. She let her husband do all of the work, that way if he got in trouble then she would be safe _

_"You__ stay the hell away from me you son of a bitch..." Kenshin said. __"Keep__ your hands of__f__ of me." _

_"You__ really have learned to get a mouth on you__."__ And his father lunged for the boy, only to have him jump up on the bed and jump down. He was finally getting his chance to run, only to realize he had forgotten the bag of belongings in the room. His father was already stumbling in his __drunken__ state out of the room. He ran after his little son and lunged yet again, this time toppling the boy. He heard something crack in his chest, and he let out a scream his eyes __widened. One__ of his ribs had been busted, because it hurt him to even __breathe__. But against that, he wiggled from his father and ran for the door. His hands j0iggled at the door, but it was useless. It was locked and the lock was still too high for him to reach. His father's shadow was on him._

_"Where__ are you going to go in the streets of Kyoto?" his father asked him, Kenshin stayed firm._

_"Away__ from you asshole..."_

_"I'd__ say we have all bark and no bite."_

_Kenshin started to his father and grabbed a lamp off the table in the process. He __proceeded__ in throwing the lamp to distract his father and went for the back door. It slid open to the cold winter and he __ran out__ into the snow. Blood fell from a cut __on his__ chin, but he wiped it away and kept running, despite his injury. _

_---_

Kaoru sat in awe as Kenshin crossed his arms. "I've never trusted anyone from the start, and especially not anyone on the streets. Not on the bad side of Kyoto I don't. I really never had any friends. I never had anyone to call family. Trust was the thing that I had no way of getting. Everyone at the time backstabbed me...it was a hard deal. And, as same with trust, I keep my guard due to that incident. I never knew when I would get jumped by someone on the streets, or if my father would find me or not. I still wonder now if he is looking for me. Not that it matters because I'm not as raw of a fight now as I was then."

Kaoru nodded, and before she said anything else, Kenshin began again, "I guess, I owe Hiko more than I realize. He got me out of that hellhole; he gave me a family, a father that I could trust. He gave me love and compassion, he did so many things for me, and I owe him the world..." Kenshin stopped and looked up. "How long have you been listening?"

Kaoru looked over her shoulder to Hiko who was leaning on the railing. "Enough to know that you care, and that you still can't find it in your heart to trust me with that story." Hiko stepped down the rest of the way. "Please, continue, I know I can keep quiet." Kenshin's eyes went to Kaoru.

"Kaoru-dono, do you mind telling me why you did what you did two years ago?"

"It was just; I was scared for you that's all. I had watched you fight for sometime where I lived and I thought it was pretty cool to watch. One of the kung fu movies. I guess I admired you from afar. But, the moment I saw the both of you collapse I knew that I would have to do something. I liked you too much back then to lose you..." she smiled and bowed her head. There was a laugh in her. "Silly, isn't it? But, I visited you when you were still unconscious. I had never seen you up close before, but your face was a mess, so I never thought that I would see you again. Not until high school at least. "

"You were the one to leave the flowers weren't you?" Hiko asked. He had went up and returned quickly, he gave each of them cups and he plopped down behind Kenshin on the computer. His shoulders rolled for a moment. "I thought as much. A secret admirer. No one else would have called the ambulance and not the police." Hiko sipped at this cup, and Kenshin looked at the cup full of hot chocolate. His eyes turned quizzical.

"Hey, I can be nice can't I?" he sipped his again and turned around so that he didn't seem so there. But Kenshin wouldn't have it and led Kaoru back upstairs again.

They sat on the couch, and they were near each other sipping the cocoa and looking outside at the dreary day. A few passing flurries came and Kaoru leaned on Kenshin again. This wasn't what Kenshin thought that a romantic moment should be, but he sipped a little cocoa and turned to Kaoru for a moment. She munched on the marshmallows and had no idea when Kenshin's pressed his lips on hers. She just let herself melt from its intensity.

A/N: I like it, and I hope you got a better glimpse at Kenshin's past. Till, next time, KenSan out!


	12. Shopping Spree

A/N: I actually drew some of this chapter a long time ago, but the feeling in it was much different than what it will be in the chapter. I promise you. In the picture, Kenshin looks pissed off at a stern looking Kaoru. It may and may not turn out this way. We'll see.

**Shopping Spree**

The moment that Kaoru felt his lips press against hers, she was a little scared until the sweetness poured on her. For a man that trust and love was a stunted thing, he was surviving well. He knew how to make a girl feel good. It was taking all that she had not to want to wrap her arms around him and touch his toned chest. She spent her whole life making people believe that she was a good girl and that she would never do anything that naughty until she was married. But, she resisted herself as Kenshin released and looked her straight in the eyes with his pleading amethyst orbs. It was something that she had never seen when she looked at him though. The fact that he wasn't telling her anything more than that he wanted to love her unconditionally. And his eyes kept that message rushing to her.

"Wow..." Kaoru let out a breath, and found that her hand was at his breast, which she was surprised that his wasn't at hers. At least he was a good person...not to violate her so early. He smiled gently, and then she found herself pushing him away.

"Kaoru..."

"I...I don't know..." she looked him straight in the eyes. "What about Hiko?" And the footsteps rang up the steps to where Kenshin moved away enough that Hiko wouldn't see what was on Kenshin's mind at the moment. He closed his eyes and relaxed on the couch, Kaoru crossing her legs so that they wouldn't look suspicious.

"Hey, dad..." Kenshin said, in a gruff uncaring voice. Hiko scanned his son for a moment and then looked forward, but then when he turned to look at Kaoru, he smiled. Kenshin had to look over to Kaoru for a moment and wonder how his father saw past her innocent eyes. Hiko said not a word and shrugged his shoulders. It was inaudible to normal ears, but Kenshin heard,

"Ah...young love."

Kaoru did however catch the little laugh that made her blush. Kenshin shook his head.

"And what seems to be funny, _dad?" _Kenshin said with grit teeth. Hiko shrugged his shoulders yet again and sat down to his knew creation of clay. Kenshin knew what was on Hiko's mind at that moment. He knew what was going on. Kenshin grabbed Kaoru's hand pretty possessively and stood. Hiko wasn't paying attention. Kenshin tried to make everything as theatrical as he could by stomping and opening the door in a fling. He looked back to Hiko, still not paying attention. Right as he was about to slam the door, Hiko yelled out:

"Way to go drama queen!"

Kenshin dropped on the porch, icy cold. He was fuming at his father and was mumbling a slew of cuss words to his father. Kaoru only laughed and sat next to him. She shivered on immediate touch which made Kenshin put his arm over her shoulders. Kaoru felt warm and protected, but felt something rough where his jacket was. She rubbed he hand against the leather that was years old. She had to look to the rest of him, his face still scowling as he thought silently to himself.

"Kenshin..." she started, enough to catch the man's attention," how old is this coat?"

"I had it since I was nine or ten, back then it was really big though."

"Why don't you get a new one?" Kaoru had to ask. That was what drew his head to her.

"This thing has a lot of memories that it does." Kaoru had things like that, but she didn't wear it in public. She rubbed against it again and stood to turn to the door. Kenshin had to follow her in the curiosity.

The warm hit Kaoru for a moment, and she wanted to drop there and rest but she continued to the hallway and made her way into Kenshin's room. Of course it was nice and neat, and she detected the closet only a few feet away. Before the red-head got the chance to stop her from opening it, he was stuck on his two feet in a ready to lunge position while she examined the contents of the closet.

"Kenshin...how old is all of this?" she asked with a hint of disgust in her voice. Kenshin let his arms fall to his sides and closed his eyes. This is why women were a bit of a pain. Everything had to be nice and clean and..._New_.

"A year or more...I really haven't grown too much." He admitted sourly.

"When's the last time you went shopping anyway? For clothes?"

"Um..."

"I figured as much," Kaoru settled herself on Kenshin's bed and crossed her arms. She continued to look around the room in silence, and enough time took to find the dresser that was on the wall opposite the door. "Do I need to look in that, or is it like the closet?"

"I really prefer you out of my underwear drawer."

"Are we hiding something in there that I shouldn't know about?" that was when Kenshin really started to blush, his ears getting hot.

"No there is not. I find it rude for a woman to be looking through a man's drawer and vice versa."

Kaoru looked at him skeptically; however she turned back to him, stepping over with a devilish smile on her face.

"Is there something the matter Miss Kaoru?"

"No but...well, I was thinking. Maybe you and I should go to the mall today. Give us something to do, get away from Hiko. Ya know?" she slithered past him and stepped into his doorway. There was a contemplation in his eyes as he scanned the room.

"Why do I need new clothes when my old ones work just as well?"

"There's a school dance coming up, and it's formal so I was thinking that you could get something..."

"I'm not going to that stupid thing."

"Why not?" Kaoru asked astonished. Kenshin fell to his bed with crossed arms. "Can you not dance?"

"I can dance just fine," Kenshin explained, "I don't like dances. There are too many people there, and I just don't go."

Kaoru placed her hands on her hips. "Is this a reputation thing?"

"No it is not. I was just...I just don't like them okay?"

Turning her back to Kenshin she wiggled her backside a little. She was using what she could to get Kenshin to follow her. Women had there advantages.

"Then just come with me while I go, if that wouldn't be too much to ask."

"Might as well. I'm not trying anything on though. You won't get me to." Kaoru shrugged.

--

They got into the heat of the mall, Kaoru sticking to Kenshin like they were frozen together. He shook the snow off his shoulders, Kaoru following suit. She replaced herself on his arm, her feet leading him through the mall. Kenshin seemed to cringe at the sights the mall had to offer. They passed several small stores, Kenshin staring at the mall map doing his best to memorize the places that he might want to go when Kaoru finished. After a few moments of walking, she went into a store. Kenshin unlatched from her the moment that she stepped in. It was...pink. Too pink for a guy to follow a women no matter how much heart he had for her.

"C'mon Kenshin, you won't die because it's a women clothes store," she tried to say while Kenshin continued to feel his skin crawl. He scrunched his nose at the heavy scents of perfume coming from the place.

"I don't know; the smell is rather suffocating."

"It's perfume. Don't you like it?"

"Maybe a singular one, but there's about ten that make it rotten."

Kaoru's glare was a formidable one, one that she gave him when they got into the fight several months ago. However, he'd learned to live past the dagger glare only to cross his arms and look back at her. "Suit yourself Kenshin. I'll be here, don't get yourself lost alright?"

That meant that he was free of her grasp momentarily. Rolling back his shoulders and adjusting the jacket, Kenshin turned around in the mall. It was years since he'd been here, and he really didn't like all the people that looked at him like he was an oddity. It wasn't everyday thought that you saw a red Japanese man though. He made sure to put an ugly look on his face going across the way to a perfectly placed bookstore.

The cashier, who was looking board, gazed up at Kenshin and nodded a head while the punkish teen read the different genre sections. He was looking for a good action story. Maybe a mystery with the action. When he found a section that he liked, he squatted next to it and started plucking each of the ones that looked interesting and read the backs or skimmed the pages. He was at the edge of the section finally sitting seeing that not many others were skimming around. Glancing up, he saw Kaoru in the window of the store looking at a rack of dresses that she hoped to find something that she liked. She took out a yellow one that was the right width for the school and put it over herself.

"Wow..." he said aloud, only to look down at the book again and blush for the second time in the hour. That was when he realized he was acting like a geek and cursed himself since that was his girlfriend, or was technically at least. He continued watching her, the words on the pages he held no longer important to him. And he saw that she was always going back to that sun yellow dress. It was great against her skin, and it was just like her smile. His eyes drew down to the book in his hand that he knew he would read later. He paid for it and stalked back across to the store that Kaoru was in. He hid as he stepped in, and the perfume was suffocating. He watched her like a stalker. Finally, when she was about to put the yellow dress up thinking that she didn't like it, his legs moved him forward until he was right against her.

"Oh, I thought that you weren't going to come in here."

"Miss Kaoru, I advise you picking the yellow one back up."

"Why? I was just looking. I'm not really getting a dress. Not if I'm not going to the dance. It's one of those girl things I like to do. One of those things that I know that men can't handle," but Kenshin didn't turn away like she thought that he would. His hand took the dress from the rack and felt the silk in his hand. It was a great dress, and Kaoru was a great girl for it to be on.

"If...if I can..." why now wouldn't it come out? Kenshin wanted to stamp his foot into the ground and have a tantrum. Kaoru turned back around and saw the struggle went on his face.

"If you can...?"

"If I can see you in this dress..." he pulled it off the rack and handed it to her," only if you wear that dress, I will take you to the dance." It was hard to get out, but Kaoru's sapphire eyes managed to get bigger and bigger in happiness.

"Really Kenshin? I mean really, really?"

"Yes, really really." Kaoru was about to jump for joy. Kenshin took it from her hands. "I'm paying for it alright?"

"But Kenshin,"

"It's on me." He was feeling more romantic already.

"Don't get carried away Casanova." she warned. Kenshin shrugged.

"Okay and I will only wear this dress here," she said taking it from him," if you buy new clothes."

"Huh?"

"You heard me Kenshin. I know that you don't want to, but it would make me happy."

It wasn't what she said; it was that womanly charm that she held when she said it. The beauty, yet childishness the way that she looked. Kenshin didn't want to; but he did. He nodded to her, his head falling slowly. He didn't want to. Really, really.

--

By the end of there trip, Kenshin was wiped out. She had bought him nice clothes for the dance, as well as a few different outfits that she wanted him to wear to school. Kenshin just took her home, almost in silence. He stalked in the door, even too tired and...Humiliated to say a word to Hiko. He just flopped on his bed with the bag beside him. He couldn't think, and his feet were going numb. This was the thing that made Kenshin still wonder about women. How the heck could they shop nonstop like that? Still, there was going to be an advantage. He got to see Kaoru in that dress. Even if it was at the school dance. He closed his eyes and began to dream.

A/N: short sweet and to the point. I wanted it to be Christmas, but then its Japan. Till next time, KenSan out!


	13. Just Another Statistic

A/N: Thank you people. I know that that chapter was a little less than usual. It was just like filler almost. Now, it will get better. The dance itself will be next chapter, along with mounds of mayhem, but this one is going to be almost all Kenshin. It's also going to be one of my sadder chappies.

I also have to say that, when I originally started this, I got the idea from a boy at school. It morphed away from that and this is just another fiction story I suppose. This chapter may be considered R if you want it to be too. But, the rest of the story is PG-PG-13 depending on what chapter you're reading.

**Just Another Statistic**

Even though Kenshin thought that it was just going to be that he was going to float to la-la land, he couldn't go there. He really couldn't go to sleep, even though he knew that Hiko had looked in several times, as well as Ayame and Suzume to wonder where there nii-san was. He laid there thinking quietly to himself what he had told Kaoru several days ago. How he had left his parents after they had tried to kill him, but, it wasn't as simple as what he had told her. That was one time out of hundreds that he felt so alone in the world. He was scared, and he didn't know what to do then. And, he had said it in conviction that Kaoru wouldn't care but, that wasn't all that was true. It wasn't right. He had lied to her. He couldn't tell her the truth that he wanted to. His mind had the true scene running through his head, but his mouth wouldn't let it come out as he wanted it to.

Turning over, Kenshin felt his stomach churning, and the pain returning to him from all those years ago. He would never repress it, as much as he tried to. Even now it just made him wonder what it made him turn into afterword; was that why everyone was afraid of him. Why he liked to fight, why blood was an interesting sight to him. Did he enjoy the contact when he punched someone as hard as he could, and watch them tumble over? Was that it?

He told her the truth as he could. He told her as much as he would let himself without it going out of control, without it scaring her. He told her just enough, and maybe it would be more routine had he spoke of a day other than that one. That day, Kenshin thought, that day he had lost something precious. Something that he would never ever get back. On that day, he did the one thing that he even regrets doing, and on that day, when he lost that precious thing, he became just another number on a chart.

---

_He was waiting in his corner for them to come like they always did, but they didn't for some time. He stomach was knotting hard and his hands were clamped in prayer. He closed his eyes as the tears poured out. He was still in pain from the day before. Could he take it today? Could he make it through? His feet slipped on the floor as his head went through his legs. Kenshin was so frightened and his body was so locked up he wasn't sure that he could do. He wasn't sure that it was possible. The clock was ticking so slow at that day, he was wondering if they would come. Would he finally get a break from all of it? _

_But the footsteps came, and they came slowly. The door opening to his father's large figure and glowing eyes. He wrapped his arms around himself. He was scared, he wouldn't deny it. He felt his face drain of color, he felt the fiery presence. There was a little rebellion left. And, he wished that his mother was there right now. She wasn't like his father at all, but he barely knew his mother. To that he was lying too. He wished her presence was in the doorway. _

_"Why are you hiding from daddy?" he asked, to which Kenshin uncurled lightly and reached for his bag. His father kneeled to him, that smile so evil stretched on his face, and Kenshin felt his legs go numb when he wanted to stand. He whimpered, and his father was able to take him in the moment of weakness he thought that he had vanquished. He was held under his armpits, looking into that cruel face as the tears continued to fall. _

_"Are you scared of daddy? Are you?" _

_"Get the heck off me!" Kenshin managed to come across his voice, scared though when he was shaken lightly. _

_"You don't want daddy to hold you Kenny? Is that it?" Kenshin started flailing his little feet as hard as he could. Working them into his father's chest hoping that it would finally reach down so that he could be dropped. But his father was wise enough to raise his child upward. Kenshin squirmed harder and looked at his father's bare arm. He sunk his head down and bit into the flesh as hard as he could, taste the coppery taste as he did. His father dropped his, as per wish and Kenshin scurried away, only to realize he hadn't grabbed his bag. But, there was no turning back. He crawled, still jarred from shaking and the fall. Just pushing as far as he could. _

_He felt his leg be grabbed, and brought up yet again with the blood rushing to his head, his hair falling in his face. It was an even more defenseless position. He had his nails to and scratched at his father. He did clip his nails, though it hadn't been for some time since he had. He slashed as hard as he could, hitting nothing as he tried. The tears were blocking his view, and he hiccupped trying to stop himself. His father was just letting him hang there, thinking that it was funny to watch him try and act heroic. He closed his eyes, still trying, and his father turned him right side up holding him as tight as he could. Compared to his father, Kenshin was an ant. _

_"You really are asking for it child. You know that?" his father asked. Kenshin didn't hear anything. He let his voice say everything._

_"Get the hell off me. Leave me alone. Leave me alone you bastard!" he yelled as hard as he could when his father put him on the ground. He kicked, and his shoes were into his father's chest hard. He slashed still with his nails. When his father tried restraining him, he bit him on the hand leaving his teeth marks in him. His father cringed back and it gave the red head enough leeway to start in a crawl and then break into a run. He went into the kitchen, using his brain for once and going into the junk drawer and the silverware. His father dragged him out as he pocketed something, feeling he had only gotten a spoon that wouldn't help him. _

_"You won't get away with any of this. Besides, why do you want to run away? Daddy has a present for you this time." His father was still grinning goofy as he slammed his son to the ground, jarring him even more. That was when Kenshin began to scream at the top of his lungs, tears taking over his face, snot falling out of his nose. He still kicked and flailed while feeling in his pocket. His father grabbed the boy's wrist and had him pinned. His leg slipped, but his father kneed it back down. Kenshin still screamed that horrid scream, especially when his father took his hand off of one of the wrists and started to pull at his son's pants._

_"Get off me!" he screamed." Please! Please, please!" Kenshin yelled. _

_"You've been a naughty boy Kenny, I have to punish you." His father said, like it was nothing. Kenshin still tried clawing at his father, but it wasn't enough to stop him from taking off his son's pants. Kenshin held his legs together. His father unstuck his legs and proceeded to do what he had done to Kenshin. Kenshin screamed when his father licked his cheek. _

_"Go ahead, scream, as loud as you want, its doing you good." So a naive Kenshin still screamed, still scared of what his father was doing. And he knew what he was doing because he had done it to other women that he brought to the home. There was a sharp pain, and he clawed at his father's neck. _

_"Stop! Stop! Stop!" Kenshin turned his head to the side and his body wanted to rip apart. His other hand dug into the floorboards of the home. He waited for it to happen, and he felt the pain and kept screaming until his voice was gone. When his body was too weak, he no longer moved around except to try and make himself more comfortable. _

_"You're a good fuck Kenny." _

_It took too long, and Kenshin dug his nails into his father's shoulder to which his father was happy like in the way he reacted. Kenshin took his hand from the floorboard when it seemed that his father was lightening up. He went into his coat pocket, feeling the utensils for something that would work. He had a spoon, but there was another there. A sharp edge cut into his finger and he took the handle of the knife, continuing to beg his father for leniency. _

_"Please, please daddy, please." _

_Blood started to pool when his father released him and he was still in pain in his lower limbs when he took the sharp paring knife and flung it forward straight into his father's shoulder. His father stumbled and pulled at his son's hand as he pulled it out and started forward again. His father didn't have any grip on the boy's wrist as he plunged the blood stained paring knife again, this time, closer to a place that he wanted, and he twisted it as hard as he could. His father was now the one screaming. But it didn't make him happy. He still cried, but managed to life up as more blood dropped to the floor. He took out the knife and hit again. _

_After the third strike, Kenshin stopped counting, and looked toward the rings of blood where the stab marks were. His father's eyes rolled back, and he swayed gurgling on his own blood. Kenshin didn't smile though, he didn't think he had gotten any revenge as his father thumped hard against the wooden floor. Kenshin let his eyes droop, hardly moving his legs. He felt the blood around his thighs and knees, and cringed knowing that it was his blood. The tears kept falling, faster and faster. But his voice was too rough to scream, or to whimper. He dropped the blade and swallowed while he managed to rise up. His whole body was sweaty, and in pain. He looked over to the body lying next to him, and he didn't see the chest moving at all. He stood, his legs quaking, and attached to the end table knocking off the lamp table. It crashed against the floor. He jumped, thinking his father was going to kill him for the broken lamp. His father didn't get up though. Not at all. _

_Kenshin pulled up his pants, the blood still staining the area. He limped around the room, back to where his things were and retrieved them. Back in the living room, when he came, he looked at his father and then to the back door. For a moment, he turned his glance to his hands, stained with the red liquid. He closed them, and let the tears fall even more before leaving the room and into the streets of Kyoto._

---

The teenager opened his eyes, and moved his head which was stuck by sweat on his pillow. His eyes were still half-lidded. He looked to his hands again, and he saw the dark red liquid like he did all those years ago. He swallowed, and got out of his bed stumbling over his feet as he went out of the room. His heart started to pound like it would come out of his chest, his hand covering it as he held tight to the wall in fear of collapsing. The bathroom was like a refuge, and in the light he still saw the blood, smelling it so fresh like when he saw when he was ten. His eyes were bloodshot, as though he had never slept at all. He had his hands under rushing water, but no matter how long he had them, the blood was still there. Like more would drip on them. Kenshin shook his head. This wasn't real. He knew it wasn't real. This was just him with a large imagination. He had to stop thinking these things.

"Dad..." he hissed as he lowered his head putting water over his face to wake up. He turned back to the mirror, wanting so much to slam his fist into it. The blood was on his face, dripping down. The water rushing out of the faucet was red too. Now it was really going too far. His heart started beating faster and faster...and...

Kenshin shot up from the bed, the same sweat from the dream. He looked at his hands, clean, but he still started to let out a scream. Footsteps ran through the house, and the door opened pouring light into the room. Kenshin had his hands held out, which gave Hiko a clear indication of what his son was screaming about. The tears rolled down his red cheeks. Hiko kneeled to his son, Kenshin automatically taking the large shoulder.

"You had the dream again?" he asked. Kenshin swallowed his throat sore. Hiko forced his son's hands down and rubbed his arms. "It wasn't real, alright? Just move on alright? It was the past, you'll be okay."

"I want to forget otou-san..." he said in a whisper." I want to forget. I haven't had this dream..."

"Let me feel you," his large hand went over Kenshin's eyes as well as his forehead. "You're getting sick. It was just the fever. You won't have it again."

Hiko rose, knowing he had to get medicine before the fever got any worse. Kenshin didn't let go of his shirt sleeve though. And, as much as Hiko wanted to tell him to get over it, he couldn't. Kenshin was too much of a tortured soul for him to do that. He wasn't that cruel.

"I won't leave alright? Just let me get a cold cloth and some medicine."

Kenshin reluctantly let his father go. Outside the door, Ayame and Suzume whimpered to each other at what was going on. They followed Hiko out the door and into the kitchen.

"Is nii-san alright?"Ayame asked.

"Yeah, nii-san alright?" copied Suzume.

"He's sick. You two need to go back to bed now." Hiko told then. Ayame led her little sister to bed, but the paused at Kenshin's door where he lay in the bed curled up and shaking. Ayame continued on when she saw Hiko coming with a wet cloth in his hand.

Hiko closed the door, knowing his son was a vampire when he was sick. Settling next to the bed, he put the cloth over Kenshin's forehead and shoved the medicine down his throat. All the while, he was wondering what not only he should say to comfort Kenshin, but what also he should do to help him. He hadn't had the dream in awhile. It had gone after long stints in therapy. But now, after three years, it suddenly came back. Could it be the emotions? Hiko shook his head.

"You didn't tell Kaoru the truth of that night did you?" Hiko asked. Kenshin shook his head. "Could that be it?"

"I don't know," he let out in a rasp. "He's not here is he?"

"He's been dead baka deshi. Don't worry. And you have your sword to protect you."

"I killed him. Does that make me a bad person?"

"You protected yourself."

"Tell me I'm a bad person, please."

"I can't," Hiko argued," you're not, so stop saying that you are."The large man thought for a few moments, and could see that Kenshin was falling limp. "Go to sleep."

Kenshin didn't protest.

A/N: I'm the most horrible person in the world. Kill me now! I feel bad, but it's for plot. Tell me what you think. Till next time, KenSan out!


	14. Dancing On Needles Part I

A/N: Well, at least you're not all that mad at me. It will only cause a few problems in the story, not anything really that major...I just thought that it would be appropriate, for the way that Kenshin was...now I'm ranting. Okay, on with the story...

**Dancing On Needles Part I**

The school yard was much less intimidating than usual. If it wasn't only the weather causing less of a buzz, it was the fact that the group of six, add Kaoru, was now down to four for two days. The student body had taken notice to that too. The only one that was openly worried was Kaoru, and though the other three didn't show it, they knew that it was there.

Kaoru knew precisely why Kenshin wasn't there. She had gone to see him twice, and the first time Hiko wouldn't let her past the front door. He didn't offer much explanation for why either. But on the couch she saw a bundled up Kenshin. His long hair was all pulled down, and his face was pale. He visibly shook. And when he looked at her, his eyes were the same pain she saw the first time that she looked at him. But he looked back down as Hiko shut the door.

The second time, she was only allowed a slotted amount of time to see him. This time, he was in his bedroom still bundled. His eyes didn't look as bleak as before, but she could sense that he was ill both physically and mentally. He would tell her a few things, but she wasn't exactly making out what he was trying to tell her. When his hand touched her, it was cold, but he seemed to perk up a little more. After that time, Hiko pushed her out of the house.

Now, he wasn't there yet and Kaoru began to question if he had actually lost his sanity or not. But, across the white ground there was someone walking over in a leather jacket and the new shirt that Kaoru remembered him picking out. Her face lit up. His had gained more color now, and his eyes were much stronger, had a much bigger flame to them. Kaoru couldn't resist the temptations to run over and hug him as hard as she could. She heard the small wheezing there was still left in his chest from illness, but he also grabbed around her.

"Did I miss something?" his kind voice asked her. It seemed almost like he had completely gotten rid of whatever was making him so zombie-like. She didn't answer his question as he put his arm around her shoulder and walked to his group of friends.

"So, had it been fun without me...?" he gazed at the still solemn faces. "Where's Sano? He's never missed a day." Kenshin said.

No one answered. They just shook their heads and looked to one another wondering if they would know. But then Kenshin ducked his head, remembering something that Hiko had told him. "Oh, wait..." he bit his lip.

"Is there something that you know Ken?" Sojiro asked. Kenshin brought up his head yet again.

"I'm afraid he's started _it_ again and...He tried and was almost successful."

It may have been very cryptic to Kaoru, but it was obvious that the rest of them knew.

"When?" Aoshi quietly said.

"Why?" asked Sojiro.

Kenshin only shrugged. He sat next to Sojiro, still wondering if Kenshin would say anything. He cracked his neck to each side, Kaoru hopping up next to him to see if she could figure out what was going on that made everyone so frightened.

"How did he try this time?" Aoshi asked which more than he usually said was. Kenshin let out a sigh, knowing that he was the bearer of bad news. He waited, hoping he would be able to word it to where Kaoru wouldn't be able to tell, but he closed his eyes.

"Wrists."

Sojiro's shoulders dropped. "Have you seen him Kenshin?"

"No, no I haven't. But, I think we might need to go soon, get him to feel better."

"Kenshin?" Kaoru shook his arm," why won't you tell me?"

"You wouldn't understand Miss Kaoru."

"I think that I would! Why are you hiding it?" Kaoru asked. But she realized that Kenshin wasn't getting angry, rather, he was getting slightly depressed.

"Sano is hospitalized for trying suicide. He's done it before Miss Kaoru, that's what you don't understand. He too is similar to me, but he didn't go through what I did," Kenshin turned back to his group as he spoke further. "When Sano lost his family, in a car accident, he was the only one that survived. It came so suddenly, that he didn't know what to do. He wanted see his family again, so he tried before..."

"Oh, I see..."

"Dad and his father, Sozo, they're friends, that how I found out. Sano went through therapy, spent a couple of weeks in an asylum for his suicide attempt and then was released to Sozo where he's been fine since. That was...until now. It was like a repressed memory to him, now that it's come back, he tried again. But, honestly I think he'll be fine."

"He won't go back to an asylum, will he?" Kaoru asked. She had befriended Sanosuke real well.

"No, I don't think so. Not this time anyway. Sozo's like a nurse you would find there, and he's a good hypnotist. Not professional, but enough to help his son."

Kaoru nodded and left it at that. Things were coming into light that she really didn't want to know. Kenshin's past, now Sanosuke's. Next thing that would happen was something bad would happen to her. Then she really would be part of the group more than ever.

Through the day, Kaoru had her eyes on Kenshin to make sure that he didn't so anything. And now, he was writing more than ever in the notebook that he would let no one see. He wasn't one to not pay attention. The teachers would slap at his desk, and yell at him to pay attention, almost like he would constantly be in trouble before for being a punk. But this time, he wasn't even talking back. His hand was moving, even when he wasn't looking at the paper, and he only closed it when he moved from class to class.

After school, Kaoru attempted to approach him, finding herself repelled somehow, like there was something protective around Kenshin.

" Kenshin, are you alright?"

"Yeah, why?"

"You seem a little out of it," Kaoru told him. From the cold chill that she got, she was stuck five feet away from him.

"Out of it? Miss Kaoru, I'm fine."

"You weren't yesterday, or the day before."

"I got a little bug Miss Kaoru, that's all. I'll be fine."

"You weren't paying attention in class," she said. "And I know that you at least do that much. You're too good of a student not to pay attention." He'd finally let down the cold shield enough for her to hug him. And he hugged back; hugging her like there was no tomorrow. It felt warm though, to Kaoru and to Kenshin.

"I'll be fine. I'm only a little bit distracted, with the thought of Sano in the hospital, and a few other things that I have coming up," he paused for a moment, looking into her eyes and assuring her that he was alright. "And I'm just writing what my head is pouring out. It's probably gibberish to anyone other than me." He laughed, in a way that made Kaoru divert from that fact that he was actually not alright.

"The dance, tonight, are you coming to pick me up?" she asked him.

Kenshin's grin went ear to ear. "You know I will okay? Just make sure you're ready when I get there."

"I will."

He kissed her on the lips briefly and then started over to his bike. In his hand was the composition notebook that his "thoughts" were going into. A paper slipped out of it, and fluttered over to Kaoru. She grabbed it before it got wet with snow, glancing at the bad kanji written. She looked around; trying to find him, but the roaring of his motorbike alerted her that he was long gone. Looking at it again, she folded it up and tucked it in her bag and went on.

--

At home, Kenshin was greeted by his little sisters smiling at him widely. They were helping him feel better. His father was lounging on the couch, looking toward the ceiling and then turning when he came through the door. "You feel better?"

"I'm fine dad. I have Kaoru to help me," he went over into the hallway where his room was. Hiko had gotten up to grab his shoulders. "Hai?"

"You're going to the dance right?" he asked. Nodding, he was lead into his room where a suit was laid over his bed. "You're going to have to wear a monkey suit then."

"Dad..."

"Aw...c'mon, you want to look nice for the lady don't you?"

"Dad, she'd like me if I was naked." Kenshin said sarcastically.

"Actually," Hiko put his hands on his hips," she would love you more than ever if you arrived naked, but I don't think that he father would though."

"Dad!" Kenshin yelled. Hiko started to snicker, watching his son sit on the bed. "Did you get any word for Sano from Sozo?"

That shut Hiko up. He walked over to Kenshin and sat down, moving the suit and putting an arm around Kenshin's shoulder. "This is really a tough time for you, isn't it? Especially what today represents."

"Please, don't remind me..," Kenshin hissed. Hiko looked over toward the sakabato in the corner.

"Sano wants you to call him; I have the room number alright? They said that if he did he would only be allowed five minutes to talk to you. He's staying conscious luckily, and he's doing much better. He's still being held in the hospital."

Kenshin went out and grabbed the phone, Hiko telling him the number. It rang several times, to which Kenshin was starting to want to hang up. Hiko overlooked his son, seeing his hand was actually shaking like the day before. Not all of him was better yet. When Kenshin was about to hang up, he heard a voice.

"Hello?" it was a tired Sozo.

"Sagara-san?" Kenshin said meekly. In the back round there was a beeping that sounded rather steady.

"Kenshin, I was expecting you soon."

"Is Sano okay enough to talk?" Kenshin said, knowing that there was a worry in his voice. He closed his eyes, almost holding his breath the seconds that Sozo waited before telling him. There was a talking in the back round, Sanosuke's voice sounding very weak. Sozo came on.

"Yeah, he only gets five minutes though Kenshin. He's probably about to pass out," there was a shifting of the phone. During that time, Kenshin's leg started bouncing up and down in nervousness. Hiko sat next to him, putting his hand over Kenshin's leg to stop him from shaking the coffee table. Nodding as acknowledgement, Kenshin heard Sanosuke weakly answer.

"Hello?"

He couldn't help but smile.

"Guess we have to postpone the fight huh?" Kenshin asked, shifting on the couch and picking up a pillow to clutch.

"Yeah, sorry dude."

"Sano, whatever entered your mind?" Kenshin asked.

"Nothing, it just kinda happened and bam," he explained. It was obvious he was impaired by medication. "So, what have I missed? Have you and jou-chan...?"

"Not yet Sano, wait for the wedding bells alright?" Kenshin managed not to laugh. "The dance is tonight."

"I know; I forgot that Megumi actually was going to let me take her..." he rasped." Stupid..."

"I'll tell Megumi you're sorry alright?" Kenshin told him.

Sanosuke was silent for a few moments, but hearing him breathing was all that was making Kenshin happy. Sanosuke was a good person with a typically cheery demeanor. What you hid inside was a monster. Though, Kenshin never believed that the monster would be this cruel to Sanosuke. After a moment of wheezing, Sanosuke said,

"Are you taking jou-chan?"

"Yep, she's got a nice dress too."

"Are you wearing a monkey suit for her Ken?"

"Yeah, if I have to."

"She'd like that. You know her better than I do, but she likes the sentimental things, don'tcha think?" inquired Sanosuke. Kenshin bobbed his head to the side.

"You think I should do something else?"

"Nah...Well...you could do something that she wants you to do but will never tell you."

"What's that suppose too...?"

"Especially since what today is," Sanosuke stopped, and Kenshin felt his head drop a little. There was more shuffling, and Sozo came back on the phone.

"Sano needs his rest alright Kenshin. Maybe you can call him tomorrow. I think he'd like that."

The phone went dead. Lowering it from his ear, Kenshin just stared at the little holes that he put to his ear and to his mouth. It was one of those moments that no matter how many times you've seen or used something, you never get tired of getting fascinated by it. Clutching the phone, he half lidded his eyes and thought of Sanosuke's weak voice.

"Baka," Kenshin muttered hanging the phone up. He still held his head down and looked at his toes wiggling in his socks.

"_Something that she wants you to do but would never tell you__..."_That didn't let him go the entire evening.

By five thirty, Kenshin found himself looking at the suit in a full length mirror Hiko kept in his room. His red locks fell over his shoulders, still wet from the shower. He held at the hair, pulling it lightly and starting to think how his father would drag him along by it as a sort of torment. Feeling the hairs start to rip from his scalp, one by one. He went to the bathroom and pulled out a pair of scissors, looking at himself in the mirror. He was seeing the little boy with disheveled hair that he had once cut, but not right when he went on the streets. He put his hand up to the nape of his neck and grasped the wet hairs. The scissors hovered there for a moment, still contemplating if he would actually do it. But he put them down, still holding the hair in place and walked to the kitchen pulled a paring knife from the drawer. Ayame and Suzume were at the table coloring, wondering what their brother was doing by consulting with one another. They looked back up.

"Nii-san?" Ayame asked.

"Nii-san?" Suzume asked. Kenshin dismissed them and went back to the bathroom. The scar was visible where he had his hair all in his hand, and the knife was right above where he held. He started to pull it through, each hair breaking with the paring knife. He forced it through, his eyebrows furrowing as he did. Finally, he was able to bring down his arm and hold all the hair in his hand. He looked at it, slightly uneven where the knife cut, but shaped around his face right. He put the hair n the garbage can and cut at the rest to shape it up and fix it back nicely. He washed the hairs down the sink and stepped out.

--

At her home, Kaoru was frantic putting on her dress and her make up. Her finger nails were painted, and her hair was curled and hanging down her back. Her father watched her run through the house getting her things together. She put a shawl over her shoulders, and grabbed a bag, deciding then to ditch the shawl. The door bell rang, and she ran o the door slipping on her shoes. Kaoru's heart was pounding in her chest as she opened the door. The boy before her looking different. His hair nice around his face, cut at the nape. He was in a nice tuxedo, and he gave a bow to her.

"Are you ready princess?" he asked, showing her the car that he was going to drive her in. It was his father's but that would work.

"No motorcycle?"

"No motorcycle.

"You bring my little girl back the same as she is right now Himura-san!" Koshijiro yelled.

"Don't worry Kamiya-san, I will."

Kenshin picked her up bridal style, her touching at his hair, still in awe. "You look good."

"Thanks," he put her in the passenger's seat. "Now off to the dance."

A/N: I lied...the mayhem is next chapter. If I did all I wanted this would be an obscenely long one for me. You'll have to wait. Till next time, KenSan out!


	15. Dancing On Needles Part II

_A/N: One tough crowd aren't you? Well, I hope you enjoy the dance..._

_**Dancing On Needles Part II**_

_The whole drive to the school Kenshin and Kaoru remained in an awkward silence. But, that was for the best so they might read each others thoughts. And gawk at each other of course. There was a dying question in Kaoru to wonder what made Kenshin even think to cut off all his hair. Let alone actually doing that task. The raven haired girl could have only thought that it was heart wrenching for him to go through with._

_The outside of the school was illuminated brightly. Flocks of beautiful students coming in with their dates. Kenshin parked the car next to what had to be a teacher's old car. He smiled, getting out and opening Kaoru's door for her like a gentleman should. He took her hand and then looped her arm._

_"I would carry you in, but I don't think that would be appropriate around the adults," he whispered in her ear. Kaoru blushed, laughing behind her hand as he gave their tickets to the teacher._

_They stepped along a red carpet, or what was a makeshift red carpet out of shining paper. It was already fraying from the shoes that had gone over it. It led them straight into the gym, the lights dimmed to where snow flakes up above sparkled from a disco ball going slow. With all the people around, it hid the corny snowmen and fake mounds of snow that the staff had tried their best to make look real. Three tables lined the right side of the large gymnasium._

_"It looks pretty good," Kaoru commented. "The dance committee doesn't think too creatively do they?"_

_Kenshin didn't think to answer his girlfriend, because there were a thousand things that he could say that wasn't right to say at tender moment. But, like he had thought before, the teens that were around in their long flowing gowns of all the colors, the tuxedoes that they would probably be renting for the night._

_Among all this, when he turned his eyes to look at Kaoru, there was nothing that went off in his mind other than the sound of crackling fireworks and the shine of them. She smiled to him while he stared for a moment, and then started to get a little frightened._

_"Are you going to need to blink soon?" she asked with a laugh. Kenshin turned his head away, his feet moving to the beat out of the speakers. There was something to Kenshin that Kaoru didn't quite understand at the moment. The way that this seemed like a good atmosphere for him. It was the perfect place. It was dark, and there were a lot of people to blend into. Finally, he took her and started a fast dance with her. She did what her father always told her to do, and that was following the leader._

_It was some sort of intricate dance that she hardly could keep up with, but Kenshin was light on his feet. He danced away, and was delighted by it. For one moment though, she saw his eyes flash around in sight of something. Then, in the same split second he returned to her as the song ended. He looked over his shoulder in a slight fear, and his eyes held a bit of it when he turned back._

_"Kaoru-dono, I think I found Megumi-dono that I did."_

_And he was right. Standing almost in a corner was Megumi in a teal dress. She had her hair up and her make-up on. But it didn't flatter the smile that she didn't have. Her hands held tight at her waist, and she looked as though she were ready to cry over something. She turned at the feeling of a warm hand on her bare shoulder. She looked over._

_"Ken-san..?" she asked, almost in amazement as she rose from her melancholy. The welcoming violet eyes did to her what they did to Kaoru. Told her things that she needed to know and the things that she didn't need to repeat. With that, she enveloped him in a hug, hanging her head over his shoulder as she began sobbing hard. "I-I'm scared Ken-san...I'm really scared."_

_Megumi's heartbeat raged through Kenshin, and her tears sunk through his jacket and into his skin. He knew her feelings of sadness, and he knew that the most appropriate thing that he could do for her was to rub her back and comfort her without too many words._

_"He's says he's sorry," and Megumi lifted from his shoulder to stare down at the short red-head. She used her forearm to wipe away the streaming mascara before she let even the smallest smile grace her lips. Kenshin shuffled through his jacket pocket and gave her his handkerchief. It was full of black smears when she handed it back to him, but she had cleaned herself up well enough that she didn't look like she had been sobbing too badly._

_"Megumi?" Kaoru asked, "Why did you come?"_

_"I had a ticket, I figured why waste it?" her eyes scanned the room and the mounds of people. "But, as you can see it's hardly the same without tori-atama here. You can always see him over the crowd. And he's always the one doing something stupid."_

_Kenshin shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe someone will fill that position temporarily," he tried to assure her._

_"I'm sure that someone will Ken-san, but who is the good question."_

_"Someone will surprise us."_

_But Kenshin didn't know exactly how badly he'd be eating his words. It didn't start immediately, but it was the reason that he would gaze around in a slight bit of fear, but also in curiosity. He knew that Shishio would never show his face at something like this, but that wasn't who he was looking for. The man had a way of making good lackeys out of the stupidest and most gullible people. Particularly the people that thought they were able to stand up to him. Or rather, the old him._

_Long before, Kenshin started to feel himself become, almost rejuvenated for no exact reason. It was like an emotional avalanche, and everything was crushing him and forcing him to open his eyes to reality. He saw the problems in his "fun". He would defend himself and those he knew would need it. But for the fun itself, Kenshin wasn't going to do. There was an inkling in the back of his mind, and a weird feeling at the back of his throat._

_An hour later, and nothing had occurred. It was taking too long. Waiting was not one of the things that Kenshin liked when it came to something like this. Then, there was the off chance that he was just being paranoid and nothing would happen._

_Another fast song came to an end, and the DJ came on with a silky voice. "This is for all the couples out there," he said, and Kaoru's eyes hit his almost automatically. Kenshin put a hand on her waist and she took his shoulder as the song began. They were caught in the middle of all the people. Leaning her head on Kenshin's shoulder, Kaoru felt him tighten his grip on her waist more so than he had before. Like he was protecting her with all his life. And, she looked up just one moment; her heart almost stopped. The look in his eyes was back._

_The look that was blood thirsty. The look that was ruthless and cold. It chilled her to the bone, forcing her to look back down. Kenshin felt the shifting on his jacket, and repositioned himself on Kaoru to make it easier on both of them._

_Halfway through the song, the two teens were crushed against others, Kaoru smothered of being pressed against the red-head's jacket tightly. She swallowed, and her feet fell over one another when something came crashing into them that was a ball of rage it seemed. Kenshin caught her midst his own fall. His footing was well on the ground looking at the animal that had plowed into them. A finely dressed Akira glared up at them; the grin wide and ghoulish._

_"There you are Himura. I knew that I'd bump into you," his hands shoved against Kenshin's shoulders while he motioned someone else from the jumbled to come forward. Kaoru jumped, and then sank to her knees while her body shook. There was a lot going on for Kenshin to gather, but he had enough in his mind to figure what he had to tend to first. He kneeled to Kaoru, almost crying. There was a stain of red falling down her back, staining the sunny dress to look dingy and almost bloody._

_"Are you alright Kaoru-dono?" Kenshin whispered, grabbing hold of her. She nodded letting her head fall into his chest. " I want you to go and get cleaned up; get out of the gym period," he instructed. She was reluctant to rise, relying on Kenshin to help her up. She gazed yet again to his face, seeing those cold eyes flash around the room while he pushed her along. "Get out now."_

_Kaoru hustled out of the blob of people, able more to breathe. She turned back to the blob of people, having trouble finding Kenshin even with his odd hair color. It was as though no one noticed that there was something going on. As she walked backward, hoping to catch glimpses of Kenshin in the crowd, Kaoru bumped against something._

_"Kaoru?"_

_The raven haired girl had bumped into Megumi dancing by herself near the doorway. "Why is your dress a mess Kaoru?"_

_"I...someone spilled juice on me. I have to go get cleaned up; can you tell me if you see Kenshin?"_

_Megumi wasn't left with much of a choice as Kaoru raced out of the room in her heels. Megumi turned back to the crowd that was still trying to dance, but now being broken up by something that was obviously serious. Little did she know what going on that was caused the gasps of the crowd._

_Inside, Kenshin had his line of sight on his prey. Akira had tried to weave in and out of the crowd, a large smile on his face. But Kenshin was able to see it clear as day. His eyes were narrowed more than they had been in a few months. He had that same feeling he had every time that he fought his father as a child. Whether or not he still had the terror and just dismissed it was a side issue. But, he moved like a lion, ready to pounce on his prey in the middle of the group. But, sometimes, even the predator gets their own surprise._

_Kenshin barely had enough to time to move as he felt Akira's ki slowly come upon him in a pounce. Most of his body moved from the football player's tackle, but he was caught on the shoulder and pummeled hard to the ground. The back of his head hit that floor, and there wasn't a doubt in his mind that he had blacked out for a few seconds before commanding himself to get up and fight Akira._

_There was something in his heart counter acting the adrenaline the fight Akira though. There was this tug at his heart that made him want to shy away. Sure, he knew the consequence of his actions. The fight that he was getting into that wasn't necessary. But there was something else there. Protecting what was yours was entering the equation. That was causing everything to go topsie turvy. He felt his body going out of it, and blocking every attack that Akira was throwing his punches at the appropriate time. As he had taught himself in diligence on the streets. He was a machine; he was like he was after he saw that blood on his hands. And...it made him realize something. It made him stall. Today was that day. This day was the day that the blood was on his hands. When he swung again, he saw it on his knuckles. He cringed back, retching his body away despite him not wanting to. Kenshin was trying to stop the unstoppable. The two sides of him that he didn't understand. Something hard hit his jaw, and ground in as hard as it possibly could._

_He woke up when his slid across the floor. His shoulder burned for a moment, and he was out yet again. Kenshin opened his eyes to be looking at the feet of someone. Shining shoes that must only have belonged to the principal. He tasted blood enter his mouth, and he couldn't resist to spit it out on the floor before he tried to get up. Blind rage made him not feel his pain, but now he did. Akira hit him hard when he was able to land the blows._

_"Himura-san..." a testy voice of the principal said. Kenshin turned his gaze up to the man, still hazy and shaking. He caught the glare of the principal while he extended a hand to the student. Kenshin stumbled, his ears ringing from the blow while a little more blood dribbled out of the corner of his mouth._

_"Nagawa-sensai," Kenshin muttered, his voice sounding confined by the swelling forming on his cheek._

_"Himura-san, please, follow me to my office. And," he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket," clean yourself up." Kenshin took it, but didn't dirty it by instead wiping the blood on his wrist instead. As Kenshin followed Principal Nagawa, he was paired next to Akira being held tight by the Vice Principal._

_When Kaoru returned to the gym, she noticed the music had stopped and the so had the crowd. They whispered malevolently to one another, turning to look at Kaoru and turn back to their conversations. Kaoru was able to find Megumi and join in on the conversation that she was having with a distraught Tomoe._

_"What's going on?" Kaoru asked, interrupting the blubber. Megumi turned her head to Kaoru._

_"Ken-san and Akira. They got in this huge fight. Kenshin got hit hard in the jaw. He blacked out for about a minute," Megumi said. Kaoru turned her head to the exit, but saw Kenshin or Akira anywhere. That was when she turned back to Tomoe with malice._

_"Do you know who did this?"_

_"It was Shishio's scheme. He wanted to humiliate Kenshin, wanted to bring him down in the gang. Me and Akira, he pawned us into it since we had this hate," Tomoe down turned her head. "I gave up. I don't think he deserved it. I mean, he looked so happy with you. You--you turned him around," Tomoe crossed her arms to hug herself. "Akira must still be Shishio's lackey."_

_"Where did they go?" Kaoru demanded, now becoming the one distraught. The girl's looked at each other._

_"Nagawa-sensei took him," Megumi wasn't able to utter anything else as Kaoru whipped around to go to the office._

_Kaoru stood by the door, watching the two be lectured by Nagawa-sensai and the Vice Principal, Kunesaki-sensai. Kenshin seemed controlled, holding a rag of ice to his scarred cheek as the swelling was worsening still. Another ten minutes wore on, and Hiko came through the doors of the school with authority more than she had thought. Kaoru guessed that the couple following him only minutes later was Akira's mother and father. Now it was a battle of words. By what Kaoru could make of it, Hiko was on and against Kenshin's side. One minute the tall man would yell at the principals, the next he was faced to his son. It was a long deliberation that had the student body at the windows._

_A half an hour came and went by the time they all bowed to each other to leave. Akira's father had tight hold of his son's ear as they stepped out of the office. And for good reason as he gave him an ear full of dirty language at how mad he was. Kenshin came out, leaving the ice behind revealing his swollen cheek. Hiko kept a stern glare to his son, holding out a hand to give him back the keys to the car. Kenshin nodded, and stopped at Kaoru for a moment._

_"Kaoru-dono," he hardly managed to speak. "Gomennasii and he turned away from her. Hiko pushed his son to go to the car, but lingered behind._

_"Kaoru, right?" Hiko asked. Kaoru nodded. "Who's ever fault this was, I can and will not say. But, I think you need to stay away from Kenshin for a short time." He turned away, only to be sopped again._

_"What'd they do?"_

_"He's been suspended until Christmas break is over," Hiko answered mournfully. "He will give himself his own punishment. I won't, don't worry. You can come around but...you will not want to if you do."_

_This time, Kaoru didn't stop him. She stood in shock while the rest of the world had started up again. And she wondered...where had all the work they built gone to?_

_A/N: Weird huh? I really don't have too much to say. Well, till next time. KenSan out!_


	16. Letter Reading

A/N: Okay...here we go again!

**Letter Reading**

It was weird. Having looked at a ceiling fan for an excessive amount of time while your mind just drifted away. Really, you weren't even sure if you were in your body; Kenshin wasn't questioning if the line between his body and his mind was connected though. Really, what he thought all together was, if his mind was gone, then so were the troubles. Of course, that wasn't true.

He couldn't overcome the thought of getting into a fight with Akira. Was it the rage? Or how much was he willing to risk if it was to keep Kaoru happy? His hand touched his scarred cheek, still swollen from the day before. It pained him only enough to tell him that he had done something wrong; but it wasn't enough to tell him that he had done something that wasn't right either.

Returning to the whir of the fan that he didn't need on, Kenshin placed his hands behind his head and picked one of the arms of the fan to follow. It made him a little dizzy. And it made him lost enough that he wasn't sure where he was. Somewhere between a dream and reality. It was quite the spectrum to think about. When he had dream mix with reality, then he would finally know that he had lost his mind. That would be peace in its own. Love made you crazy.

Kenshin looked over to his sword in the corner, questioning quietly to himself what that piece of sharp metal actually represented. And, blood wasn't the thing. He'd felt the blood over his knuckles before. But a sakabato was not the tool for bloodshed. It was a tool a peace; at least in his mind. There was no other reason to create such a sword.

From his sedentary state, Kenshin rose. Drawn to it, almost as if the sword itself had a voice. He grabbed its slick black sheathe, ready to wield like the samurai of ancient Japan. He slowly slid it out, seeing his face in the crafted steel. He looked into his own eyes. Deep enough to the things that he had been relaying to Kaoru all this time. The blood was in them. It was drowning his person. His head was just about its thickness. It was letting him breath. However, even that was a minor consolation. His feet did not touch the ground. He was too small in that state. He was a child swimming in the blood that he made fall from his father's chest. He couldn't manage to tell himself that it was the right thing that he was doing. It was the right thing to take a man so loosely brought up. A man so untaught of the consequence to scarring his own flesh and blood.

Kenshin was looking at that little boy, wading in that blood. His eyes held nothing. It was a smokescreen of fears and anguish that wouldn't ever unveil. That he couldn't ever unveil at his own risks of emotions. Enilations if he let anyone near his person. Near that heart that he wasn't sure actually was still beating in his chest even if he heard it next to his ear. Hiko didn't need to tell him; nor anyone else. He knew what he was, what he'd become...singing then began.

His eyes were clouded over still looking in that steel. They were getting watery, but that dam would not break for the small droplets. He held them in, pulling the sword until only its tip was still in the sheathe. And the dam broke. He looked at the timeline of his life like it were in pictures before him. So many things that he'd swear he would surpress. They just looked him in the eyes and practically begged to be understood. His child, staring him in the face and mouthing the words that he didn't want to believe.

Move on, it told him. Tell yourself what happened has gone. It could have only made you so much stronger. And Kenshin sank his head inbetween his knees like a dog, the sword held high and catching the light. Singing was still hitting his ears. He let out the sobs, mumbling a forgiveness, but never allowing himself to crack so far as though he would fall to thousands of tiny pieces. His heart let out an ache; his legs trembled; his eyes bled the tears of his pride not allowing him to give up these memories so burning in his soul. And the tip of the sword fell from the sheathe his hand finally lost grip on. He let out silent heaves, seeing the world, only as black as it was while he demanded it to stop.

The door open, light falling over the contortionist laying in the bed. His back heaved the breaths that he was trying to managed to keep himself alive. But the figure never stepped any further than the opening of that door. He looked upon his son in awkward silence. Watching the daze the boy was in while he still tried to collect his thoughts. Then he turned his head to the second figure. Her hands clutching the folded piece of paper at her breast. Her smile seemed to lose its luster, but only for a moment. With a jerk of the head from Hiko, Kaoru allowed herself to walk forward and into the darkness of Kenshin's Hell. The door slid closed behind her, to which she turned and noted the way Hiko acted was like a guard of Kenshin's life. He still was outside the door, watching like a hawk as Ayame and Suzume begged to see their nii-san.

Kaoru kneeled at the bedside, watching Kenshin's silent heaving sobs before scooting closer to him. He made this obsticle for her. The sword that he knew had tucked at his breast was pointed toward her heart. His head turned, not enough though to show his eyes, but the tears that were falling from them.

" I ask you to leave," he rasped almost inaubibly.

" ' _I walk in this place of heavy silence. A place of lost hope and ambitions. Some of which look like their just over the horizon, but I could never get to if I ran all my life,_' "

Kaoru recited from the page. She kept her voice low, ducking her head down and breathing in his ear. She touched his back, his spine obvious to the touch from the cotton shirt. He never shifted toward her; rather, waited silently for her to continue.

" ' _In life, I'd always asked myself questions of truth, of emotion, of the world. I asked myself how people can live without their feelings in their hearts. But their are living examples such as myself. I ask favors for my other organs to vouch as my heart had left my body. It beats, only when I have my blood boiling in a rage toward offense. Offense, to something I don't know._

_" ' If I did say my pride, then it would be cliche' but in the same reality, it would be true. At least, to others it would. You understand your own heart to the fullest that you want to comprehend it. Can I understand the Morse code that my heart sends me now? Yes I can.' "_

Kaoru waited silently for the rise of her lover. She was reading this, she guessed, as a way to tell him that he had the emotions he was speaking of. And for him to hear those emotions come from someone elses mouth, rather than the scribbled words on a crumbled piece of paper. Without much reaction except that the heaving had stopped, Kaoru granted herself the permission to continue on.

" ' _In my own defense of knowing what my heart is saying, I may contradict that also do not understand, as not all humans do understand. And I am merely human. I look into the sapphire eyes of another and ask my heart ' is this the thing that you want, nay, the person?' I may not get the response so richly disired, but in all the Hell on Earth I do get something. My heart speaks to me. And it tells me what it feels, but not what I do. _

" ' _I look in the sapphire orbs, and you see the past through my eyes, and I beg you of all people to understand that I wish you to see past these things. I may not be the best in letting my heart say what it wants when my mouth speaks, but I can sure as hell tell you as I write. I will be damned if you can not appreciate this. I mean what I say in no cruelty whatsoever. Exceptance is the thing that I so richly desire._' "

Kaoru then started laughing of all things as she read this aloud to herself. Like she was enjoying a good book. Its language was that of a poet, and she loved the way he said his things as though he were in the past. Now, there was a more alarming response than ever from Kenshin. His red rimmed eyes turned to her in not shock, but in interest. He looked into he, saying "go on, go on" so she did just that.

" ' _Should I tell you what this long winded thing is suppose to mean outwardly, or do you want me to keep rambling? I will tell you, you do not have much choice as to what I write down. I love you, but not so much as a way that teenagers love one another. I see from this different angle. I see the future through your eyes like you see past in mine. You say what their is to say and there is no other way to say it once said. You have this air about you; might it or not be beauty, but still it is a charm and a wit. You are that ambition on the other side of the horizon. And, not two feet can take me there, but four surely can. All you need to do is take my hand, and we can walk to that horizon much faster. _' "

There was no signature, as there was no opening. It was a page out of a book to her. Like it was not Kenshin who wrote it, but someone else. There was no way that someone else could understand what they had between each other. Could they? No.

" Kaoru-dono I, I wish to,"

" You need to be quiet," she whispered. Her hand went to his bruised and swollen cheek. He flinched at the touch, but welcomed himself into it before falling into her breast. " You need to stop thinking that you have to understand everything Kenshin. When things do go wrong, you will feel bad. And you do something that you can't understand how or why, then don't try to," she put his chin up to look her in the eyes. " I will walk that horizon with you, if you will stop your crying. "

" I'm not crying about not understanding. I understand I don't need to understand," he told her. " I can't take feelings that I can't..."

" When you can't understand a constant feeling or thought of someone, then that truly is love Kenshin," Kaoru explained. She started to laugh. Placing the sword back in its sheathe, Kenshin turned toward Kaoru with a wide smile on his face, but tears still in his eyes.

" Arigato," he said, bowing his head. Kaoru copied his rresponse and threw her arms around him. He bent back to the bed, staring at that ceiling fan.

" How did you get the letter?" he asked silently.

" You dropped it."

" Really?" he asked, turning her to where their sides were facing up. " Or, did I do it purposely?"

" I don't need to understand." And his lips touched hers. He still had all the thoughts on his mind; but Kaoru's precense made then so petty or some reason. And his head was sending his a lot of Morse code. At least he understood that.

A/N: Funky huh? No this is not the ending, but we may be getting pretty close okay? Maybe three or four more chapters, max.

When I was writing this, when I was writing Kenshin's feelings, I was about to cry myself. I hope you got the same response. Till next time, KenSan out!


	17. On the Streets Again

A/N: Yay! I like you guys! Thanxs for reviews. Cookies for all! Now, on we go!

**On The Streets Again**

Time was again going quickly, and though nothing ever subsided, knowing that Kaoru was at his back whenever he needed her was one of the most comforting things that Kenshin could imagine. He felt like there was a piece of him that he was missing, and that she was that missing piece. He couldn't explain it in any amount of words, but the smile that he was unafraid to show was the biggest showing of all.

Kenshin was about the house more often, and he was cooking more often for Hiko and his little sisters. Of all the times that he had seen Kenshin depressed, that was one of his worst spells ever shown. Like any son of the Seijuuro's though, they perservered. It was a quality.

As Christmas was starting to come around, the scene at the residence itself was changing. First, it was just the outside of the old home with flashing colored lights and a few lawn ornaments. Then the inside full of wreaths and the tree that Ayame and Suzume fought to put ornaments on. Kenshin watched all this unfold while reading a book and waiting for Kaoru to stop by every afternoon as she always did to show him what the teachers had gave her so he could keep up with it. Kaoru hugged against her beau always, which put a fire in the teen boy's heart.

One day, Hiko was not home yet and Ayame and Suzume were being watched by Kenshin as he lounged and strummed on the guitar that hid in his room. They were drawing pictures of Christmas scenes to turn even the fridge Christmasy, not that it didn't already have enough items on it. Kenshin saw the little lists that they were making. Now that was something to try and translate. Hiko relied on Kenshin for most of that when they would go shopping. Most of the time, the only reason that Kenshin would know was because he was the one that was helping them write it, or he was overhearing them say what they wanted while they wrote. But that made Kenshin wonder.

Kaoru came knocking on the door and he rose to let her in.

" It only gets colder doesn't it?" she shivered out, dusting snow off of her jacket.

" As spring comes though, it will warm up," Knshin reminded her, shutting the door and locking it, almost in a slight fear. Kaoru turned back to him as she hung her coat on the rack.

" Your neck must be cold without your hair," Kaoru giggled after plopping down on the couch seat and talking to Ayame and Suzume. Kenshin stood aside while she brought out her Literature book and started reading.

" So, you have an assignment?" he asked, dropping neck to her and reading over her shoulder. He put his arm over her shoulders and leaned in a little further.

" Iie. I was just reading because it looked interesting. The teachers are starting to lighten out studies," she leaned back in the seat, taking Kenshin with her as she did. She mused and then looked to him. " You know, after tomorrow, you only have two weeks before you go back."

She said this quietly and quickly, placing her head on his shoulder and looking at the girls singing where Kenshin had the radio playing. They were thinking the same things. Something along the lines of what would happen when Kenshin returned? But Kaoru was thinking more along the lines of, would Akira try and pick another fight? or Shishio even? Kenshin on the other hand was trying to think how he was going to tell the gang that they weren't really a _gang _gang anymore, just a group of friends.He shrugged. Sanosuke would be fine, and he knew that Soujiro would be content, he always was. Honestly, all Kenshin could wonder was how Shishio would take it. He just laughed. Shishio would probably try to create a gang of hir own and rule the school.

" I'm not worried," Kenshin openly admitted before one of the loudest knocks came to the door. It was either Hiko who had forgotten his keys(unlikely) or it was...

" Kenshin!"

Yep. Sanosuke.

Kenshin rose to the door, being the servent that he was, with three pairs of womenly eyes following him while he let a snow covered friend in.

" You should have warned me."

Sanouske shrugged hanging his jacket on the rack next to Kaoru's. " Eh, I thought that you would like a surprise."

Kenshin turned his line of sight to Sanosuke's wrists that still had little bandages hiding where he'd slit them. From before, he seemed to be happy, like doing what he did had made him feel better.

" Konichi' wa Sano," Kaoru stated, watching him plop down next to her and nearly bounce her up into the air. Kenshin took the other side of Sanosuke who's stretched his arms lenght over the both of them.

" How are you jou-chan?"

" Fine," her eyes slithered to Kenshin. " What brings you here anyway?"

" Surprises," he leaned in, and out of his pocket pulled a small box.

" What is that?" Kaoru asked, leaning toward the velvet blue box as though it were a magnet. Kenshin kept staring at Sanosuke.

" It's a ring. It's kinda saying sorry to Megumi and saying I want to be with her."

" It's not an engagment ring is it?" Kaoru gasped, devestated.

" No way in hell. Otosan wouldn't let me," he opened it, " besides, I'd give her a diamond the size of her eye, not cubic zerconium."

" It's good replica," Kenshin stated. He looked over to Kaoru, marvelling at the ring like it was the last that she would ever see. Kenshin didn't even need to ask her what she wanted, he had already found out for himself.

At that moment, Hiko walked in forcing Sanosuke to stash the gift and look toward him. The elder tweaked his face, looking at his son witha glimmering eye.

" A party?" he asked. Kenshin shook his head. There was no further questioning as Sanosuke stood up to leave.

--

Knowing what to get Kaoru was one thing, knowing which of that thing was another. Kaoru was a girl he knew deserved the best. He'd been saving up his money for an occasion such as this one. He counted it, about three hundred dollars or so. He nodded. That was good to get a ring. But he wasn't just getting cubic zerconium like Sanosuke had, he wanted something much more. Not to engage, but show that they were near that step. This was the one person that he knew spending his life with was not just a possibility or a whim, but a priority.

Later that night, he bundled up and headed out the door under Hiko's watchful eye. But he knew what his son was up to. He watched Kenshin drive away with snow falling all over him. The flakes blocked his vision just a little bit, but he got to where he wanted to go before there was too much snow. He tore his hood down, and took refuge in the first jewelry shop he could find. There were only a few men browsing, probably for their wives. Casually, Kenshin continued in and scanned for a good ring that he knew tha Kaoru would enjou. But it was hard. He looked at it, not like a rock, but something reflected that smile that Kaoru had. Something that made him feel the way he did when Kaoru smiled to him. That was how he knew that it was worthy of her. An attendent came to him

" Are you looking for a certain ring in particular?"

Kenshin's head drew up.

" Kinda."

" Who's it for?"

" My girlfriend."

" Ah, are you engaging her?" the man asked. Kenshin bobbed his shoulders.

" I just want a good gift for her."

" I see," he started pulling out some things that he thought that Kenshin might be interested in. He looked every one of the pieces over, but there was nothing. The closest he got was half the radience of Kaoru's smile. To the attendents disappointed, Kenshin bid him farewell and he moved on.

He did this several times, and it was nearly nine thrity when he decided to stop in one last store. He looked at the man who showed him in the rings, and right in the middle he found the right spark. He could see that smile in the ring, that one that he had been longing to find, but when he asked for the price,

" Six hundred."

Kenshin almost fell over. His hand went over the money in his pocket, knowing that it would not be enough. But he wanted Kaoru to have it with all his heart. He looked up at the man.

" Could you put it on hold or something? I can get the money to you tomorrow," Kenshin said, almost downtrodden. The man nodded his head.

" Tomorrow, no later than six," the man said, " then I will put it up for sale again."

Kenshin nodded.

He hated how he lied and said he would come up with the money. There was no way that he was going to be able to do something like that in such a short amount of time. He paced outside the store thinking of some way. Could he ask Hiko? No, all he would tell him was to get a job. He was in the process of doing this. He couldn't ask his friends. There was just something in him that he couldn't make himself do that. There wasn't much in the bank. Something struck him in eureka.

It was the last thing that he ever thought that he would ever have to resort to again. Something that he liked to call Buying and Selling.

When he had went onto the streets, a ten year old kid was not one to think about all the consequences of his choices. One of those was money. Something that he didn't have, something that he wasn't sure how he was going to get. But, there were some people the he grouped with whom he liked to call his brothers and sisters, though they were far from it. They taught him about the drugs that got him arrested.

One of the specific things that they taught him was that if you didn't have a lot of money, there was always a way to get some. The scenerio was buy with what you had, sell for what you needed. There were some people, Kenshin learned quickly, that would pay any asking price that you needed. If you needed double, you made sure to ask triple so you could pay back those you bought from. It was simple. Once Kenshin learned it, it was a system that supported him those three years.

He got on his bike and thought for a few moments about what he would need to do. He remembered most of the streets that were the hotspots, whether or not they had been busted or not was what he had to figure. But, around this time there were more people that would beg for money as to find a place to stay.

Kenshin stopped far enough away that no one would see what he came on. He threw up his hood and prayed to Kami-sama that he wouldn't get caught. Taking a deep breath, he combed the street looking for something. Ten minutes and he finally found something. And he was quick to make the deal. The man was grateful.

Staying in the back streets, he went a few down, keeping an eye on the outside to find where he found where his bike was and passed it. More than ten streets down from where he bought, he came across a man that was willing to buy from him. Kenshin got the six hundred, stuffed it in his pocket, and bid the man adiou. The only thing that he didn't configure, was the money that he would need for what he bought. But, he didn't care and got the ring from the dealer before. They'd never find him.

A/N: Yes, it is short. The next, I promise,will be longer. So don't complain.

will they find him? Dun dun duh...we'll see, won't we? Till next time, KenSan out!


	18. Mortality

A/N: I can believe that it was a little confusing...maybe this chapter will clear everything up.

**Mortality**

As Christmas was right around the corner, the madness was coming with it as always. The young red head, full of more joy than he ever thought that he would acquire, stayed close to the house and made it more festive. This time, he stood outside, looking at the blinking lights that so entranced his little sisters. Looking down on them, he smiled thinking that they would be in a great home now that Hiko decided that they too would soon be adopted. They would take on the Seijuuro name, unlike him.

Turning around, Kenshin watched them try hard to build snowballs in their little hands and throw them to one another, falling apart mid-air. The red head stifled not to laugh considering it was not only them, but Kaoru, that this was happening to.

Upturning her head to gaze headlong into the smirk of her boyfriend, Kaoru picked up a nonformed clump of snow and just tossed it into his face. Chills went down the young man's spine, the pride that he held standing and watching was diminished as he opened his eyes and brushed the snow sticking in the thick's of his hair. This is what he loved about Kaoru; unsuspecting.

Kneeling down to the ground to scoop up snow and throw back, Kenshin was ever caught off guard when snow rolled down his shirt and wetted his back. Then, Kaoru pushed him into the ground, completing her mission. Kenshin almost ate his way through the snow as Kaoru sat on him.

"Get your ass off me," Kenshin said, muffled by the snow. Kaoru only laughed.

"An ass on an ass."

Silently though, Kenshin lay there plunged into thought. Kaoru had started rubbing her butt in a sort of victory dance on his back. Kenshin smiled unseen.

_Three, two..._he gazed upward at Kaoru,_ one..._

Kaoru fell backward into the snow, forced to stare at the overcast sky until Kenshin was leaning over her. He took his victory, but held out his hand to lift her up. Duped again. She tossed more snow into his face. The teenager backed away, making sure that Kaoru wasn't able to topple him over and sit on him again. Meekly smiling, the boy tossed the snow, hitting his girlfriend who was almost letting herself get hit.

In the end they had chapped faces and lay looking upward to the dapple grey sky and listening to Ayame and Suzume babble while putting a snowman together.

"I didn't hurt you did I?" Kaoru asked, looking over at Kenshin while she munched on a ball of the snow.

"Nah. You couldn't hurt me," he said, not thinking about his words.

"You want to make that a challenge mister?" Kaoru roared, flinging upward and throwing the snow on the ground. Kenshin shrugged. As he was about to speak,

"No fighting," a strong voice stated. The car door slammed shut, revealing that Hiko had just returned home.

As Kenshin gazed up at his father, staring like the two were younger than Ayame and Suzume, Kenshin was able to notice what Hiko was wearing. It wasn't exactly what you would call "suitable for winter".

"Aren't you cold Hiko-kun?" Kaoru asked, rising to see the thin sleeves of the shirt rolled up. Hiko looked down on his person, then to the exasperated look on his son's face. He smirked.

"Kaoru-dono, please don't get him started."

"Girlie, we had colder winters than this when I was growing up," he stated very proudly. "This temperature was nothing compared to that."

"Too late."

And indeed it was. Kenshin was forced to listen to a lecture that he had heard so much the blisters on his ears remembered it. Kaoru was looking on in bewilderment though. It was something that she apparently hadn't learned from her grandparents, or else it wouldn't have been interesting. Kenshin, on the other hand, was waiting in the kitchen as he listened. He laughed too. He laughed at the parts the Hiko would start exaggerating. And he watched Kaoru. She was a very gullible person, but luckily one that was capable of tolerating a man such as Hiko.

Kenshin sat after sliding a batch of cookies into the stove. There wasn't much on his mind more than the small lump that was in his pants pocket. Just a day away. That was what he was thinking. Just one more day until he could give it to her. It was actually more planned out then it should have been. But then, Kenshin thought that something special was what it should have been. He would give it to her on Christmas Eve because he had permission to take Kaoru out.

Something rather unexpected brought Kenshin from his musings. There was a small crash of glass, and the screech of tires. He jumped from his seat and ran to the living room where Kaoru was petrified over the littered pieces of glass. Her feet were curled tightly on the couch, her arms curled in. Hiko was already down on the floor and examining the wreckage. It wasn't all that hard to find what he was looking for. He set it on the table, unconcerned about it and more concerned about the girls playing outside. He opened the door and called them in. They were more than happy to oblige.

Before Hiko could pick it up again, Kenshin was the one to take it. It was a rock, not too big with a small piece of torn notebook paper on it. He read the scrawl quickly. There wasn't too much that he needed to read though.

_Your late_, was all that it said. Kenshin hid the paper and tossed the rock nonchalantly over to Hiko. Examining it thoroughly, it went back outside and eyes went to the teenage boy in the room.

"What was that?" Kaoru asked. Her voice still held the fright while she tried to uncoil from the position. Kenshin looked at everyone. Suzume began crying and grappled to his leg. The only thing that the red head could think to do was to comfort her. Hiko's glare became apparent.

"Yes, what was that?" he asked accusingly.

"I don't know," Kenshin said, hugging his little sister tightly. Suzume used her nii-san's shirt as a tissue. Soon, Ayame was also crying and hanging onto her brother.

The air was thick between the people. Kenshin was scared out of his mind and looked outside again. There were clear marks were the car had taken off in a hurry after a dead stop. The only thing that Kenshin could do was hold his little sisters closer and beg that everything was okay.

"Where were you those few nights ago?" Hiko asked. He knew that Kenshin had bought that ring, but he wasn't sure how he had bought such a nice stone. Kenshin would admit he lied, but not in front of Kaoru. He looked into Hiko's dark eyes for a few moments, then over to his girlfriend and swallowed while ducking his head in. He still comforted the girls now able to calm down.

"You know," Kenshin said.

"Anywhere else?"

"Iie."

"I don't really know that I believe you."

Kenshin was not the one that wanted to yell, but in this case he said. "Then you better start!"

Whether it was the fact that he didn't want to tell the circumstances, or the terror that the incident had caused, Kenshin was unable to keep the tears from falling as well. Now it was Ayame and Suzume that were helping him as he silently sobbed.

"It's okay nii-san," Ayame said quietly.

"It okays nii-san."

Suzume patted his chest, which sent warmth. However, he dismissed the human contact and stood too leave. Not even they could help him in this situation.

Kaoru rose to follow the red head, but Hiko held her back. When she gazed up at the stern face that was not all that she was getting. She felt a vibe of distrust coming from Hiko as he went on. But also, the way that Hiko acted that Kenshin was trying to explain to her. Kaoru fell back and watched the two go outside. She knew that this was between them.

Muffled by the windows, the words were caught but the decibels in which they were said carried. She waited, holding onto Ayame and Suzume in Kenshin's place. And, telling by the tone, most of the yelling was coming from Hiko rather than Kenshin. Kaoru wasn't able to pinpoint one time that Kenshin really, really yelled. He must have wanted to calm himself, though found incapable.

The minutes ticked by. Like the deliberation in the principal's office. After fifteen minutes, they reentered, both taking a separate course but going to the same place. Kenshin's eyes weren't as calm or half as pleasant as before. He seemed to have regained that mistrust of the world only after that short argument. He sat next to her, silent, while Hiko started with the pottery yet again. Finally, Kaoru took this as her cue to leave and bid Kenshin a farewell.

--

Later that night, Kenshin sat alone. His little sisters would open the door and ask to play, but he would tell them to politely go away. The little piece of paper was folded in his hands. The world was against him again. Quickly, he began to feel as he had before. There was no one that he could trust. No one that he could lean on. Hiko was mad at him for this one too. Luckily, he didn't have to spill what he did exactly, but Hiko knew that he had done something that was connected with the past.

Kenshin had never been late on payment, but right now he thought that he was safe. That wasn't happening. The only thing that might leave him alive would to become an agoraphobic; that meant giving up a lot of things that he loved so dearly. The world itself was a prison.

Darkness fell very soon in the winter, and he was left with the hanging light and his thoughts of the past. His thoughts of how the future might become. He took out the "memoir" and started to write what came to his mind. There really wasn't much thought involved in this senseless writing. And it was in red ink no less. The journal had been some sort of window. Constantly looking over to the clock for when it would strike midnight. Kenshin noticed that time was still-standing. He waited and watched it. His hand was working mechanically and he would even turn to page to write more. He looked down at it at eleven fifty-nine. The words were not hateful, but they weren't kind. They weren't different, but they weren't the same. They were of all things regretful. They were sad, they were scared. They were the same kinds of things that he would write when he was thirteen years old after a dream about his father. Or after a meeting with the therapist where something he didn't want to come out did. He put the book away and looked at the piece of paper one more time as the clock struck midnight.

--

Nothing happened that day. Kenshin sat on the porch, and he waited for something. Something that would solve the irrational fear. Something that would bring about the want of agoraphobia. The window had an ugly blue tarp over it, shielding it from the wind and the flurries of snow that drizzled down to earth in all their wonders. He had told Kaoru he would meet her at the restaurant. The one that he was going to surprise her with the ring at. He looked at it in his hands. It mixed with the snow beneath him. A gust of wind chilled his blood. Looking back toward the window, or what once was, he saw Hiko's silhouette in the window before moving away. Kenshin stood and he started to walk down the street ready to go into town.

--

Kaoru was pacing near the place where Kenshin told her to wait. It was cold, but the restaurant looked warm and inviting. She would look at her watch and straighten her jacket. She knew that he would be coming down the street across so she would constantly keep her eyes there. A lot of people with bags would pass her by, or across the way. Talk about last minute shopping. She paced more, keeping her body warm. This wasn't the best place to be, but it was better than nothing. She looked across the way, and there he was. The red hair was flying in his face for what was left. His eyes were drawn to his feet. He hid his hands in his pockets and looked up.

There was something odd about the way that he looked, the way that he acted. He wasn't all fancy; he wasn't even acting like he wanted to be where he was. He did a three sixty of the place and then started across the way. It was then that a car made a sharp turn to which Kenshin started to run. It narrowly missed his legs and made another sharp turn to aim directly at the red-head. There was no fear on his face this time. It was neutral, and expecting. Kenshin starts running, and people are following him. They can hardly keep up with someone of his speed. There was one sharp difference between then though. Kenshin had a switch blade, they had guns.

The red head went right past her, looked directly at her as he did in a sympathetic "I'm sorry" way. Then the men pushed her down. An old man helped her up, but Kaoru was afraid to follow. There were noises. Screams, clangs. Then she heard the last thing that she wanted to hear.

Gunshots.

A/N: What will be the outcome? Will Kenshin be okay? There are two chapters left. You'll just have to wait and see. Till next time, KenSan out!


	19. Blood And Tears

A/N: Thank you, you helped me over the one-hundred review mark and the 20,000 hits mark! Yay!

Now, on a more serious note. This chapter is probably something most fanfictioners will not want to read. I will not give it away, but if you're expecting something fluffy and nice out of this...don't. You can stop reading now if you don't want to see. However, the only reason I do this is that it fits. An I had already written it in a notebook as a different story, so it stays.

I warn you now...

**Blood and Tears**

At the first hearing of the semi-foreign sound, Kaoru was sure that she had heard things. Or, a least that was what she wanted to believe. She paused in her actions for a moment, thinking that Kenshin would emerge from the hole in between buildings and sweep her off her feet into the restaurant. That didn't happen though. A crowd gathered at the mouth of the hole in awe looking at the crime that was so low. Her eyes ducked and she started to run toward it. The banging went three times Kaoru remembered. Three. Meaning there was any chance that Kenshin could have been injured because he was the one without the gun.

At the mouth of the alley, it was practically fumigated of the pests that had let off the deafening sounds. Police were apprehending suspects that Kaoru was sure would be locked up forever. Narrowly she peeked in seeing nothing at first, but smelt the stench of decay from the trash. Then, almost as clear as day, the sound of coughing hit her ears. Kaoru's heart stopped when her feet started.

Kenshin was lying on his back, his hair was a mess and his eyes were hazed. He didn't rise from this position only causing more of a commotion of the people and of Kaoru's nerves. She kneeled to the figure that she knew she would always find strength in. But there was no strength this time. Only weakness. Only pain in his violet orbs. She knelt next to him with worry while grabbing one of his hands that was growing cold, or already was.

"Kenshin?" she asked with a shake in her voice. "Kenshin, can you hear me?"

The red-head turned his head enough to look Kaoru clear in the eye. At the corners of his mouth, blood dribbled. There was a whistling sound Kaoru couldn't deny. She only saw the red ring staining Kenshin's white shirt. Putting Kenshin's hand on her cheek.

"K-Kaoru-dono? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine but you need to get some help," Kaoru said going to Kenshin's other side. Her back was against a brick wall as she prepared to lift Kenshin's small and now feeble looking form. With the police outside, Kaoru knew that there would be an ambulance in a situation as well. As she tried to lift her beau, Kenshin was fighting against her while his body was still able to move. Kaoru leaned down near him.

"Baka! Don't be stupid. Let me get you help," Kaoru nearly yelled. There was no way else she believed that she could get in through the red head's thick skull. She knew though, that Kenshin wasn't thinking that he didn't need help. There was a reason that Kaoru was going to find.

"Why won't you get help?"

"Because it wouldn't matter," Kenshin rasped. There was a light tone to his voice as he started to speak. "I don't want to be pessimistic with you Kaoru-dono. I don't want you to cry either. They'll freeze to your face."

Kaoru stifled a laugh as Kenshin turned to look at the sky that was bleak.

"I've done a lot of stupid things in my life, and I know that I could not make up for it. This would probably top the list not to cover all my bases. But I think that the reason that I did was important enough."

"Nothing is worth your life," Kaoru hissed. As she did, she noticed Kenshin starting to reach into his pocket. Outside, the police were waiting for Kaoru to finish talking to beau. When looking back down she saw in his nearly limp hand his ring of keys.

"What are these for?" asked Kaoru while taking them.

"They're for you."

"Don't start writing your will Kenshin. You're not going to die."

"Look at it," the red-head interrupted. "Look closely alright?"

So Kaoru looked at the ring of keys very delicately. The jingle of keys was interrupted by the gleam of something more than metal. A small gem was between the keys and she glowed just like it did. She was able to see her eyes glimmering in it.

"Kenshin, it's beautiful."

"Then keep it, alright? And love is worth a life I think," Kenshin took a moment to gather breath. They were getting much shallower the longer that he spoke. "There is something thing I thought about, when the hot metal started to fly. That I realized what love meant."

"Kenshin, you're not going to die--"

"I-I don't know when it was I learned love; or when someone tried to teach me. I just kept-I k-kept turning it a-away like it was po-po-poison."

Kaoru couldn't help but cry; it was stinging with the blustery winds. "I look at you n-now, and I see what I've been de-denying all this time. I still haven't figured out w-why you were the one to break through t-this...w-w-w-wall."

"Kenshin stop talking. I hear an ambulance alright? You can tell me after you get better."

Kenshin sucked another breath. "I'll forget by then," he too was crying and he coughed a dribble of blood down his chin.

"I think that maybe, my fate is...is to find...to find love and then...then show the ultimate...sa-sac-sacrafice..."

He gave Kaoru this little smile, and his face was so...childish and he looked like any schoolboy should with rosy cheeks and sparkling eyes. His eyes started to flutter while she placed Kenshin in her lap. His hands were cold to the touch when he reached up for her face. She looked over to paramedics who saw the scene and even they paused to the sight. Kaoru jerked her head over and put Kenshin's hand over the wound in his chest after he'd lost consciousness. The paramedics relinquished her of the red-head. He'd bled over her pants. As they bundled him up, Kaoru found herself in hysteria and in pain watching Kenshin suffer. She had almost forgotten that she had the ring of keys in her hand. Rising quickly, she followed the men as they put Kenshin in the ambulance. She climbed in, and she was still crying heavily. One of the medics handed her a tissue as she held one of Kenshin's still cold hands.

"Aishiteru."

--

It was a long time of waiting in the bleak halls of people passing in lab coats with stern faces. Kaoru was at Kenshin's side every moment. It was horrible, to be at Christmas. When Hiko entered, Kaoru looked up to him with a glare.

"What did you say to him!" she yelled, never relinquishing Kenshin's hand. She looked at his face that was slowly paling the longer that he was in a comatose state. He was relying on something to breath, though Kaoru really wasn't sure why. All she heard from the doctor was the word "lung" which she connected the dots in meaning that was probably why he was in the state that he was in. Hiko sat down and turned toward his son.

"I said nothing more than I should have," Hiko stated as though she was blaming him for pulling the trigger. "I had just told him that he needed to be careful and that he was stupid to do what I knew that he had done. Look what happened, I had a feeling that this was going to happen."

"Are you alright?" Kaoru asked noticing the way that Hiko was hiding his face form her. His head turned away from Kaoru and from his son.

"I'll be fine."

Kaoru looked toward him with a smile. Though Christmas had passed over a week ago, she couldn't help but celebrate it with him. The first day, they said he was too unstable to be seen. It gave her a lot of time to think about what she wanted to get him exactly. Out of her lap she pulled a large rectangular gift with red and gold paper and a large green bow.

"It was hard to think of something to match what you gave me Kenshin, real hard. I want you to open it."

Hiko quirked a bow at Kaoru and what she had just said. Kaoru carefully put it where Kenshin's lap would be if he were sitting up. "What are you doing Kaoru?" Hiko asked low. Kaoru took control of Kenshin's hand like it was attached to strings. She maneuvered his fingers and hooked them into a crease of the paper to rip it off. Hiko leaned toward the present to see what it was. Kaoru was even lighting up seeing it happen. And under the paper she revealed to her audience that was what under the paper a picture frame was with a piece of notebook paper framed inside.

"What is that?" Hiko gawked taking it from his sons' hands. Kaoru waded up the paper and noticed as Hiko was looking it up and down. He read it probably ten times before glancing toward Kenshin and Kaoru and the way that Kaoru was stroking Kenshin's nearly lifeless hand and murmuring something to him. He saw the ring on her finger that he would say was the cause of this.

"Did he write this?"

"He writes a lot of things Hiko-san. He wrote everyday in this journal that he told me was four or five notebooks long because he had wrote for four years. Have you ever read anything of his Hiko-san?"

"Only essays, but even on those, his word choice was...better than most I would say."

"He wrote that to me. Because he loved me. He's said he was still trying to fathom how I could make him love when no one else could. He says that...that this is fate for him, that this is how he is supposed to die because..."

"Because he finally learned to love."

Kaoru upturned her head to a figure standing in the doorway. Tomoe was silent, and she was remorseful with her arms folded over her chest while she leaned on the door. Her eyes were nearly blank while looking toward Kenshin.

"He said to me once that if I or someone else taught him the stunted emotion that he would die soon after. I thought that he was drunk, honestly."

"Tomoe-chan." Kaoru looked toward Kenshin when there was a pause in his breathing. It started up again. "You shouldn't see him this way."

"I want to wish him a Merry Christmas. And this is for him, from the school." Tomoe handed Kaoru a large card that she was holding. "We hope that he gets better, alright?" Tomoe started to walk away. Kaoru stood quickly to follow her. When she got the girl's attention and she turned around, Kaoru hugged Tomoe tightly.

"Thank you, Tomoe-chan."

A/N: The epilogue is next. It's all about to end. Till next time, KenSan out!


	20. Epilogue

A/N: Wow…the computer crashed on me and I lost a bunch of my documents….at least there was nothing there that I was working on at the time. I'm sorry if you don't like this chapter…this is the end of the story though. Here we go!

**Epilogue**

_March 13, 2007_

I suppose that it is appropriate to call this the final edition of Kenshin's epic tale. Being that this is his journal, I'm sure that people can realize that I'm not him. I'm his girlfriend Kaoru, and I'm about to put an end on his journal.

Kenshin was a greater person than I think that anyone could have ever expected. He did things that people didn't think he was capable of. And many people I talked to noticed the change in Kenshin. They only noticed though at his last moments. Moments that I have a hard time remembering.

It was in the third week of January. We had celebrated Christmas with him, celebrated the New Year's with him. But each day, he just kept losing something in him that we never understood. His color was drained, and his eyes had sunk in. Kenshin wasn't the same person on the outside. I told myself when he came to though; he would be the same person the inside. But he never came to. He just laid there and withered away.

On January 16th, Kenshin was struggling hard with his breathing, even on the respirator. And the doctors told us that his vitals had been falling gradually. First his heart rate, then his blood pressure. There was nothing that they could do. Then, shortly after New Year's, they asked us for the first time if we wanted to pull the plug. Hiko just looked up to the doctor glared and said:

"No!"

We pushed the doctor away that day and kept talking to Kenshin like he was still with us and was still responding. But shortly after the first week, he asked us again. The times that he was asking us, they were just getting closer and closer together. We never said yes to him; we just watched his breathing deteriorate to nothing and then the systems failed.

I couldn't do anything but cry after he passed. I was scared beyond my wildest nightmare. I told them that he needed to bring Kenshin back. I told then that Kenshin was someone that was never going to die. They just looked at me and said: "We're sorry."

I made sure that I could get those last few words before they put him in morgue. At least at this point, he was no longer on that machine and I was capable of seeing his face. I know that it was selfish to say something like that, but I missed seeing him. And even though he was pale, he looked as though he was sleeping, and that's what I pretended was going on until they took him away. That was when I remember that Hiko was holding me back from chasing the body down the hall. I scratched him up pretty badly, but when he was holding onto me, he was grounding himself to the floor so that he wasn't chasing it as well.

I had a hard time telling everyone. I could hardly tell them through my own tears. I saw how hard that everyone took it, and that they were unable to contain themselves. The school mourned for a few days, but I was not attending. I was staying with Hiko as he prepared the funeral and comforted Ayame and Suzume. He was the one that was taking it the worst even though I never saw him shed a tear. Not around anyone at least. But you could see the red rims around his eyes, and the black circles from lack of sleep. He was always looking through the photo albums and talking like Kenshin were still around. To this day I am certain that room remains the same, covered in cobwebs. The books left unreturned from the library in the dozens. The library didn't disturb Hiko though.

Not even a week after Kenshin passed, the funeral took place a top a hill where his grave was placed. It was a good place, I was sure that Kenshin would have liked this view. He would have said it was colorful when the sun set, the way that I saw it. I sat there for hours on end just looking at the sun while sitting next to the small grave. It was like Kenshin was sitting next to me. And he was.

Though I would never tell anyone, Kenshin would sit on his grave and speak to me as I watched the clouds in the sky and the bustle down in the city. I heard him in my own mind, and I would respond back. I knew when he was touching me, because the wind always touched me in the right place. Whether it was on my cheek, or on my hand. I knew he was laughing when the leaves in the trees shook. I guess he really hasn't past away.

All these journals that he has, I read through them even though I'm sure that Kenshin wouldn't have been too pleased. And it wasn't only I that read them. I let Hiko look at them, but he couldn't get through them because they held too many memories that he knew distinctly. I let Sano read it, and Aoshi and Sojiro. And they all found their parts that they liked. Then when they returned it to me, they said that even though Kenshin wouldn't have wanted it, people would like to hear what his life was like and let them know that they weren't alone.

There were a lot of things in here I'm sure people have read that aren't exactly what you would consider the most appropriate, but Kenshin was not one to sugarcoat things for people. _Why give them a lie?_ I could imagine him saying that.

I went to work in trying to find something that would work. Someone that would read this and not think that they needed to edit things out. It took me awhile, but I found someone.

You've read story of a boy I bet you haven't heard before. About a love that he thought he couldn't find. And, after Kenshin, I realized that he was the only love that I was going to find. I will admit that I have gone on a few dates, but they never reached a second one. I could never bring myself to do that to Kenshin. Kenshin was that one person that you could never replace; there was no one else like him.

I have a feeling that I could never find anyone else; so after you read this, question to yourself not only can you find something that seems impossible…but can you change yourself from something that you think is impossible.

_End Journal_

A/N: I know it's not the ideal ending, but it is what I have written in the notebook so, you don't like it, lump it. Thanks for reading!


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